


All I Want For Christmas

by alyssa146



Series: Same Love [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Couple Fight, Dom Jensen, F/F, Gender or Sex Swap, Happy Ending, Lesbian Sex, Love Confessions, Misunderstandings, Sub Jared, butch Jensen, girly Jared
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-02
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-04-02 13:37:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 30,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4061959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alyssa146/pseuds/alyssa146
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen are going strong a couple months into dating, its Christmas time. When things get complicated will they survive it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bad News

**Author's Note:**

> And here it is! Make sure you've read Don't Get Yourself Into Situtation's before reading this story otherwise you wont get it. This story will be a tad longer than the first one, hope you like it! Leave me some love!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/89/fc/f1/89fcf1870eedcdc9e922fcb6fde50c15.jpg
> 
> https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/cf/b4/12/cfb412cabb2af36f39cb34807ff8157d.jpg  
> those two URL's are how i imagine Jensen's hair being in this story.
> 
> https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/95/fe/ef/95feefbe3ca2ed8e71a6443ae70c88c2.jpg
> 
> thats how i imagine Jared's

Gravity was compelled by the movement of the stars, or so they said. Subsidiary planets turned in their orbits because of the draw exerted by their sun, the center and the light of their existence. In exchange for such bounty, the star requires nothing, yet receives adulation for its due...

"Put that down," Jared said with a scowl as her girlfriend Jensen brandished a hideous tinsel star in her direction, large as a basketball and gaudier than a hooker's earrings.

Jensen responded with a slight outward jut of her lip, holding up the orange and red and golden obscenity even higher. "It's the tree topper," she said, scuffing the side of the gigantic ornament box with her foot. "Why was it in there if you're not going to use it? And it's the star, after all; it wants to be seen..."

"I'm not putting everything on the tree," Jared huffed, setting aside a box of horsehair red ball ornaments that were from the Old Country, or so she'd been told when she had been young enough that she and Gerald trimmed the tree together. "Have you seen that box?"

"Yeah, it's got a lot of nice stuff..." Jensen trailed off, dropping the tinsel star carelessly to one side as she delved into the box once more, bending at the waist and going all but ass-up as she dove for ornaments.

It gave Jared a brief but happy recollection of bobbing for apples at one of the Halloween parties she and Jensen had attended, and then there had been seven minutes in Heaven that Tom's faithful guardianship had extended to half an hour... The fact that orgasms had been involved and Tom must have heard them was a detail on which Jared preferred not to dwell.

"Stop that!" Jared scolded, hurrying across the living room and almost slipping on a half a bale's worth of golden tinsel here, trying not to put her foot on blown glass angels there. She grabbed at Jensen's belt and hauled as Jensen produced an undignified squeak and began to topple into the box.

Overcompensating for Jensen's weight, Jared yanked too hard and they tumbled together into a heap of girl limbs on the floor.

"It's like you've got the Land of Oz packed away in there!" Jensen declared, flushed and happy. She planted a kiss beside Jared's mouth. "Why wouldn't you want to use everything in there? It's all so beautiful!"

"There is such a thing as good taste," Jared grumbled, but she was more than happy to wind a hand around Jensen's dreadlocks and bring their mouths together again for more than a brief brush of their lips. Once they detached, both of them breathing a bit more erratically, Jared continued to press her argument. "We've acquired enough ornaments for ten years' worth of trees and I don't want the one tree in the window looking as though Santa's workshop threw up all over it."

Jensen nuzzled at her neck. "So buy ten trees," she suggested off-handedly, before kissing at Jared's neck and paying an extra devotional to the spot that made Jared shiver and go pliant in response.

"No," Jared said weakly, and thought she was saying it for the sole purpose of getting it out there. Jensen didn't often take 'no' for an answer where Jay and her panties were concerned, so Jared considered it a matter of principle to take a stand where she could. "I am not setting up and tearing down ten, when we only need one in the front room."

"Aww," Jensen protested, but didn't seem too invested in the subject given the boob grab she initiated.

"Mm," Jared murmured, all too happy to be diverted from the subject in such a fashion. It was after school, they had the afternoon – and the Padalecki house – to themselves, and Jensen had declared it a travesty that it was already past the first weekend of December and the tree in their front room hadn't been trimmed.

For Jared, Christmas didn't have overly positive associations for her as it did for her girlfriend of nearly three months. Jensen had charmed her way into her heart, but she didn't necessarily possess the power to charm Jared into a finer appreciation of all things Christmas. Jared had spent most of her Christmas evenings alone as her father Gerald, a powerful businessman, had worked right up through the last hour like Scrooge pushing more hours into less daylight. They had enjoyed quiet Christmas mornings together, opening presents in expansive living rooms beside large, well-trimmed trees like this one, then Gerald had read his newspapers while Jared enjoyed her gifts. It wasn't a holiday crammed with family and festiveness. They parted ways for Gerald to do work in his home office and Jared to write thank you notes to distant relatives and came together again for a polite dinner of take-out from Boston Market or some other place that prepared heat and eat holiday meals.

"You're tense," Jensen observed, kissing that spot below her ear once more before sitting up, pulling Jared into her lap. Her hand on Jared's breast shifted to a soothing caress on her waist.

"I don't get what the big deal is with the winter holidays," Jared grumbled, settling her head on Jensen's shoulder.

Jensen stroked Jared's hair, cradling Jared's long body against hers. "You've only had your dad, right? You don't have any big family get-togethers, or parties on Christmas eve..."

Jared shifted in a small headshake.

"My poor Jay," Jensen mourned, hugging Jared to her chest. She dropped a smacking kiss to Jared's forehead. "We'll fix you up."

"I'm not broken--" Jared began, indignant.

"Have you been caroling?" Jensen interrupted cheerfully, grinning over at Jared. "That always sparks my Christmas spirit..."

Jared shook her head. "The show choir is going over to a nearby retirement center – apparently it's something show choir does every year? I've never done it before, though. Never been in that kind of group."

"My little recluse," Jensen cooed, kissing to each side of Jared's mouth before leaving a lingering wet one full on her lips. "I'm not only dating you, I'm dragging you into the land of the living for you to flourish and get your star to shine. Now you're more popular than I am--"

Jared snorted. "Like that's possible," she muttered. She leaned forward to nuzzle at Jensen's mouth. Jensen was the golden girl of their high school, the star, the center to everyone else's orbiting planets. If Jared were to express the thought, Jensen would simply leer, you're my Venus and reel her in.

A lifetime of moving, uprooting herself from one place to the next to the next, losing people once she had begun to care for them, had given Jared what she considered to be a natural wariness and what Jensen cheerfully referred to as her ghost complex. She had flitted around the edges of high school social strata, thinking she went around invisible.

"You need to stop thinking--" Jensen began.

Jared pressed another kiss on her, climbing into Jensen's lap and burrowing into her arms, cinching her own around Jensen's muscular waist. "You're right, we need to stop thinking," she purred, and kissed Jensen's mouth again. She pressed their bellies together, licking at the freckle that adorned one corner of Jensen's full lower lip.

"Oh, okay..." Jensen mumbled, pursing her lips in an invitation for more kisses.

Jared retracted her arms, pushing herself up by using Jensen's thighs as leverage. "And we need to start doing," she concluded. "So, get off your shapely duff and help me. But only if you're going to do exactly as I say."

"Aww," Jensen groaned, but she got up and dusted herself off as Jared moved for the box of red horsehair ornament balls again.

"This year's color scheme is blue and silver," Jared informed Jensen. "So put away that gold tinsel, will you? And you can snag anything from the box as long as it's red or silver – but I reserve the veto right to put it back."

"No fair," Jensen claimed, but she stooped to gather armfuls of the tinsel she'd already pulled yard after yard out of the box like a delighted cat dispensing an endless ream of toilet paper.

Jared slanted a smirk over her shoulder and considered the tree. It was a tall one. Her father Gerald had had it delivered to the house the day after Thanksgiving – during which Jared had experienced the phenomenon known as 'Black Friday' with her girlfriend's family – and she'd been too pressed studying for finals and spending her spare time enjoying Jensen snuggles to go to the effort of pulling out the boxes and the stepladder and everything. She would put on the ball-shaped ornaments first, wind the lights with Jensen's help, take a stand regarding tinsel, and she was pretty sure they needed a new tree topper.

"It looks like great aunt Kathrin's earrings," she muttered, and shook her head, putting her hands on her hips.

"So what's your position on clear or colorless ornaments?" Jensen's voice floated from behind her.

When she swung around, Jensen was draped in almost the entire allotment of tinsel, and she gave Jared such a bright-eyed look that Jared couldn't help but grin in response.

"Clear, like icicles, or clear, like glass?" Jared said, wary. The plastic icicles were some of the oldest, tackiest ornaments in the collection.

The older and more cheesy, it seemed, the more they seemed to delight Jensen.

"Both!" Jensen declared.

Jared pursed her lips and shook her head. "Glass," she said. "But not the glass ones with the gilt trim."

Jensen heaved a sigh and began to unbundle her burden of tinsel into the open box. "All right," she said, "but after this display of anal-retentiveness, I'm going to expect--"

Jared hissed like an angry cat.

"—some wild abandon in bed," Jensen concluded, and put on an innocent expression. "What? What did you think I was going to say? Perv."

Now Jared was pursing her lips in an effort to smother her amusement. "You know, the sooner we get this done to my standards, the sooner I could be pulling your panties off with my teeth," she promised. "Why don't you grab the string of white lights and make sure they're all still working?"

"Ooh." The tinsel fluttered into the box in a molten gold deluge as Jensen abandoned it, grabbing up a coil of lights with the intensity that only the promise of orgasms could get out of her. "Coming right up."

Jared bit her lip over a grin and flipped back the lid on the box. Most of the ornaments had long, curving hooks to keep them suspended from the branches. Others were missing their hooks, and Jared planned on pillaging from the ornaments that she wouldn't be using.

The slam of a door in the distance caused Jared's head to lift from her appraisal of the ornaments. She glanced down at her slim wrist, checking her watch only to confirm that it was indeed early, far too early for Gerald Padalecki, perpetual workaholic, to have declared quitting time so soon.

"I'll be right back," Jared told her girlfriend, breezing past her and getting an air kiss blown her way, which she acknowledged by snapping her teeth shut as though catching it.

"Don't take too long, or I'll trim it without you," Jensen threatened.

Jared waved that off and went to the kitchen, Gerald's first stop by habit. He tended to check the message board they had tacked up in the kitchen, where they penned notes and takeout menus and dinner suggestions scrawled into the Sunday through Saturday blocks of the whiteboard section.

When she pushed her way through the swinging door, Gerald was standing at the open fridge drinking from an open carton.

"Augh, what are you, fourteen instead of forty?" Jared scolded. "Put that eggnog back where you found it – and I'm not going to be able to drink that, now, thank you very much."

Gerald gave a clipped laugh and pinched the carton shut, closing the refrigerator and turning to face her. "Jay-bear," he greeted her. "Glad you're here."

Jared's brows rose. They had a good relationship, but she and her father couldn't be called the most convivial of families. His opening salutation tended to be 'what are we ordering for dinner?'

"Dad," she returned equably. "To what do I owe the honor of your esteemed presence?"

"Cute," Gerald said, with a brow lift reminiscent of Jared's own eyebrow trick. "Do you want to know, smartass, or should we exchange witticisms for a few minutes longer?"

"Depends on whether you're staying for dinner," Jared replied with a shrug. She folded her arms and leaned over the kitchen island.

"Can't," Gerald returned. "I need to get back to the office, but I wanted to come home and give you the news in person, rather than text or voicemail."

Jared blinked, not sure how to respond to that. "O-kay..." she said, cautious, a spark of terror flaring up inside her over the prospect that Gerald might be pulling their family rug out from under her again, rolling it up only to move to another city, yet once more.

"We're not moving," Gerald assured her, holding a hand out, palm outward. "Though, we are going to be traveling in the next few weeks."

"Oh," Jared said, and processed that. "Christmas vacation?" They hadn't done it for so long, it had faded from Jared's mind as an option.

"We're going to Poland," Gerald told her, his mouth twitching in what passed for a smile, but his eyes were watchful.

"We're going to Poland for Christmas?" Jared demanded, pushing up from the counter and setting her hands on her hips. "But, Dad! I wanted to spend my first Christmas with Jen! Remember, my girlfriend? It's our first Christmas together..."

Gerald's expression hardened. "Jared," he snapped, using his boarding room voice. "Don't be selfish. There will always be time to spend with your girlfriend, but my parents aren't going to be with us forever."

Jared glared at her father, eyes smarting with the sheer helpless frustration of it all. Once again, Gerald came in, laid down the law, and walked out. He didn't care that this was her first Christmas with Jensen – and now that she had Jensen, it felt like she actually had something worth celebrating. And he certainly didn't care that her most recent memory of those grandparents was from so long ago, she'd been a bubbly little sprite whose favorite food had been McDonald's french fries. They had called her "Jare" and she couldn't quite remember their faces, lined but kind.

She stared down at her stockinged feet, nostalgia warring with more immediate emotions. Jared shook her head as Jensen's face was called readily to her mind's eye – her warm, beautiful, sexy girlfriend who had promised to show her all that was good and worth enjoying in the season.

"You don't understand, at all!" Jared declared tempestuously, whirling to leave the room in a state of outrage.

"Of course I don't," Gerald called at her receding back. "I'll email you the flight info. Have a good night, don't stay up too late. Study for finals."

Jared fumed on her way back to the living room. So he thought he could swoop in, parent for five minutes, drop a bombshell to shatter her holiday, and act as though nothing had happened?

She paused on the threshold. Jensen was draped with looping strands of wire that gave her the appearance of a tall, very redneck sort of Christmas tree, and the entire length was lit up with little golden white pinpricks of light.

"Got it!" Jensen announced, giving Jared her brightest grin, the flash of teeth and melting green eyes that were only turned in Jared's direction, so far as she'd seen. "Lights are a go. Baby? What's wrong?"

Jared sniffed hard, scrubbed fiercely at the corner of her traitorous left eye, and bounced over to liberate her girl of the copious light rigging she'd decked herself with. "Nothing," she claimed. "Dad's not staying for dinner. Let's finish this up and go to bed, okay?"

A trip to Poland wouldn't separate them forever, Jared reminded herself as Jensen dropped the armfuls of lights in favor of an armful of Jared. Meanwhile, she would enjoy what she had for now.

They kissed like they were in a field of mistletoe, and Jared never wanted to leave it.


	2. You Are With Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared delievers the news of her trip to Jensen, and gets a little upset.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyones liking it, there is sex in this chapter!

Silence had reigned supreme for long moments, but it gave way to a low, throaty moan. Jared and Jensen were curled up together playing one of Jared's favorite games; how long they could pursue loving kisses until one or both of them expressed the need for more.

With a soft wet noise, their lips parted. Jared sighed and pursed her mouth in expectation of another kiss, wriggling closer into Jensen's embrace as Jensen's hand stroked up her back beneath her shirt, and her eyes opened with reluctance when another kiss didn't arrive. They were cuddled up in Jared's big, wide, canopied bed; one of Jared's favorite places to be with Jensen, because it meant they could enjoy one another for long, uninterrupted stretches of time.

"Baby, you're going to have to relax, or I'm never going to be able to make you come," Jensen informed her, one hand giving up the quest for the bra hooks as she hugged Jared to her and kissed her neck. "Not into it today?"

Jared shook her head right away, tossing strands of light chocolate-brown hair across Jensen's cheek. "I'm always into it," she protested, grabbing Jensen's hand and settling it low on her belly, her own hand covering it to keep its pressure there so close to her groin. She was hot and ready to part her thighs for Jensen; she always was, so it confused her that Jensen was stopping now.

Jensen's hand turned beneath hers, twining fingers with Jared's before she could move it or pull away. "But you're stiff as a board," she murmured, and nosed against Jared's neck. "It's gonna hurt my ego, unless something is wrong...are you mad about the tree trimming?" She touched Jared's face with her free hand.

"What?" Jared said blankly. "Why would I be?"

"I didn't mean to start a war..." Jensen said, dotting a soft kiss over Jared's chin and moving up to the corner of her mouth. "Really, it's your tree. I was excited to see so many ornaments, such a variety. You must have been collecting for years."

"No, that's not it," Jared replied, squirming. She stretched to kiss Jensen and pulled her hand free, going for the fly of Jensen's loose jeans. "C'mon, I just want to..."

Jensen's hand covered hers, and Jared experienced a short-lived but intense stab of rejection until she looked up into Jensen's warm emerald eyes.

"But there is something," Jensen persisted. "Come on, Jay. Just tell me, and we'll talk about it and maybe then you can relax."

Jared heaved a sigh and gave up her determined effort to get into Jensen's pants, cuddling against her front instead. "Dad came by to tell me – not ask me – that we're going to Poland for Christmas."

"Wow," Jensen said after an instant of silence.

"I know, right?" Jared replied, beginning to pull in a breath that turned into a hitching sort of catch in her throat. "It's our first Christmas together, and I..."

"You've got family in Poland, then, don't you?" Jensen interrupted, taking Jared's chin gently in hand. She shifted in Jared's arms until they were forehead to forehead, but Jared kept her hazel eyes closed.

"Yeah," Jared breathed out. "But I want to be with you." It hit her with a painful bolt; she knew Christmas was family time, altruistic time, giving of yourself to others. Gerald had even chided her not to be selfish.

Jared didn't care about any of that in this moment. She wanted to be here in Jensen's arms. She wanted to kiss her in the veiling flurry of a white Christmas. She wanted to sip hot cocoa with fluffy marshmallows as they watched kitschy movies on television, just as Jensen had promised.

"You are with me," Jensen soothed, tipping her head and nudging her nose against Jared's before fitting their mouths together in a brief, chaste kiss. "You and me, we're together and I love you. But it's Christmas, and your dad, who's been so good to us, is allowed to get his way sometimes too, you know."

Jared huffed, jerking back against her bed pillow in astonishment. She hadn't considered it that way, nor had she considered the possibility that Jensen would take Gerald's side.

"I thought you wanted to spend Christmas together," Jared said, glum over this unexpected turn as well as the fact that she'd be going, to begin with. The rush of travel had come to be associated with the uprooting of everything she knew, of loss as well as the general hectic atmosphere that came of dealing with airports and baggage and connections and packing.

Jensen pulled her in for a sweet kiss. "It's fine, you do what you have to do," she replied. She fondled Jared, her lips curving in a teasing smile. "So let's make the most of what we have together, now?"

"Was trying," Jared grumbled, turning her head as Jensen leaned in to nuzzle at her neck. "But now you don't mind if I'm gone, so..."

"Don't be like that," Jensen protested, sitting up and putting a leg astride Jared. She spread her hands out over Jared's chest, fanning her hands out beneath the ample curves of Jared's breasts. "That's not what I said, and you know it. Of course I'd rather you were here, but if you can't be, then I'll wish you a safe trip...and a speedy return to my arms." She cocked her head, a fall of blonde bangs tumbling in her eyes as she offered Jared a hopeful little grin.

"Well, I suppose that's all right," Jared murmured, mollified. She pushed her hips up, testing Jensen's weight across her lap, sighing at the pleasant warmth that gathered in her groin as Jensen rubbed down against her in response.

"I'm going to miss you," Jensen said, lowering herself down over Jared until their lips were bare millimeters apart. She ground deliberately down into Jared and they both made eager noises. "So I have to show you how much I love you right now, and every moment we have left before you have to go..."

"Nnnh," Jared agreed wordlessly, reaching up to lace her fingers at Jensen's nape. She rubbed harder against Jensen, trying to encourage her to keep going.

Jensen grinned, kissing her with lips that dwelled slowly over each line and curve, lingering over the shape of Jared's mouth. Her hands spidered up beneath Jared's loose black cropped shirt pushing it up and reaching for her bra, unsnapping it with the ease of practice and bringing her hands back around. They kissed and Jared accepted Jensen's tongue into her mouth as Jensen brushed her thumbs over Jared's nipples in a slow but insistent drag, making them harden at once.

"Oh," Jared breathed into Jensen's mouth, shifting back into the bedding and spreading her legs.

Jensen rocked against her again but didn't move to re-position herself. The crotch of her jeans was pressing into the tender flesh of Jared's belly now.

"What do you want to do?" Jensen whispered against the corner of Jared's mouth, before kissing it.

Jared clung to Jensen like a lamprey, releasing her girlfriend as Jensen sat up only once she realized Jensen was tugging her shirt up. "Make me come," she demanded in a husky voice, grabbing at her own shirt to discard it and pulling her nude bra off over her shoulders to follow.

Jensen smirked down at her. "That's specific," she said, tracing one long finger down Jared's front, stopping in the middle of her sternum between her breasts. "So if I could make you come just by looking at you, then you'd be satisified?"

Jared produced a scoffing noise. She shifted under Jensen, pushing her hips up. "We could do frottage..." she began, because she loved oral, and she loved Jensen fingering her, but she also loved it when they could kiss and hump together and sometimes manage to come only from that.

"Hmm," Jensen said, leaning back until she tumbled back on her butt. She began to kick off her dark deniem jeans, tossing them aside until they were out of sight, gone from the bed entirely. That left her in only her plaid boxers, today striped in red, gold, and green as gaily as Christmas wrapping paper.

Enflamed by the sight of Jensen, sprawled out bow-legged and freckled and all for her, Jared sat up and pounced, not content to merely be unwrapped like the present Jensen so often claimed she was. With a squeak, Jensen went down, tumbling to the spread with Jared's weight on her.

"Ooh," Jensen made an interested noise as Jared parted her legs with a knee and settled between them. "Hey, come on, at least you can get naked." Her hands went down to Jared's ripped boyfriend jeans, tugging.

"Too much trouble," Jared complained, but got up on her hands and knees over Jensen.

Jensen tugged her jeans down, pushing a finger into the crotch of Jared's jeans as she did, making Jared shiver and sigh. She reached down with one hand to help, and fell on her side next to Jensen as the jeans got down too far and she had to wriggle and kick to get it the rest of the way off.

"You and your ripped jeans," Jensen complained, snapping at the waist with a finger.

"You love 'em," Jared said smugly, rolling the waist down with both hands and lifting her butt to get those off, too. She huffed and lolled around until Jensen laughed at her and took pity, sitting up to pull the toes while Jared pushed the denim down her thighs.

At last they were both naked, with the exception of panties for Jared and boxers for Jensen, and they were sharing sheepish smiles.

"C'mere," Jensen whispered, getting an arm around her shoulders and pressing their foreheads together. "I love you, y'know?"

Jared nodded, choked up and wordless by that free admission, three little words that were still so difficult for her to say. She pushed her lips out and Jensen snickered, angling in to kiss her.

They ended up in a heap of limbs again, Jensen winning the tussle for top, and eased together in steady, rhythmic movements.

"Mm," Jared murmured, pushing up against Jensen. She wanted to hook a leg around her and urge for harder, more, but they were building up a sweet friction for now.

"You like this," Jensen murmured, lifting her head from nibbling on Jared's lip, the typical prelude to licking into her mouth and thrusting their tongues together.

Jared responded with a needy, discontented murmur, stretching her neck up to pursue Jensen's kiss, managing only to lick at her lip.

"We should try a double-ended strap-on some time, if you like this," Jensen told her, propping herself over Jared until their breasts brushed together with each rub of Jensen's groin against hers. Mouth open, Jensen moved over her steadily, their bodies striving together in such satisfying shockwaves of movement that Jared curled her toes into the bedspread to give herself leverage.

"What?" Jared gasped.

"A two-headed marital aide?" Jensen rephrased, writhing over Jared and rolling their breasts and groins together in sweet undulations.

Jared squeaked and turned her head as Jensen stooped for a kiss, licking sloppily across her ear, undeterred.

"Why would we do that?" Jared gasped out. "You're not a boy, and I don't want you to be."

Jensen nosed at her ear. "Because it's hot, and it feels good?" she suggested, grinding down on Jared harder and making her gasp. "I'm not a boy and I don't have a dick, but penetration can be fun." As though to make her point, she thrust down harder against Jared.

Jared moaned and spread her legs wider. "Faster," she panted, wanting to feel Jensen closer to her than the two layers that separated them now. "Oh god...nnnh, Jenny..." She began to squirm in the first trembling throes of an orgasm.

"I'll give you whatever you want," Jensen promised, and pushed a hand between them, bearing down on her clit and easing into hard, languorous thrusts.

What she wanted was Jensen, but Jared had no words left in her as she angled up to take the pleasure Jensen was giving her. She writhed up against Jensen, her face hot, and reeled her in for a kiss as Jensen began to shudder atop her, using the pressure of her hand between them to get them both off.

They kissed their way through the afterglow and twined their bodies together, Jensen's leg between both of Jared's, their naked breasts pressed taut until Jensen's were somewhat flattened.

"Good?" Jensen asked, nosing at her neck and placing a soft, almost chaste kiss at the sensitive join of neck and jawline.

"Always good," Jared acknowledged, curling like a koala around Jensen, embracing her with everything she had. There was a lingering unease in her that resurfaced every so often after Jensen brought her off so confidently, or mentioned sex acts Jared had never done before. Jensen had so much more experience, and while she didn't shove it in Jared's face, bringing up something like strap-ons made Jared blush and fixate on her inexperience.

How could she keep satisfying Jensen like this, when she had so little to offer in return? She loved Jensen so much she had no confidence she could keep her, if she left her for Poland.


	3. Why Be Happy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared's still grumpy and her mood only worsens as were introduced to a new character.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyones liking it!

Most days started the right way, with door to school service.

Jared had her own car, but Jensen liked to drive and Jared enjoyed being pampered, so she permitted Jensen to pick her up almost every school day, and even those that weren't. It also helped that Jensen drove a giant Truck with tinted windows, so if they were desperately hot for each other they could climb into the back seat and go for it.

Having Jensen be the first face she saw every day had a way of putting a bounce in her step, an extra sashay as she moved down the walk that led to the circle drive that cut across the expansive front lawn of the Padalecki estate. That morning, though, she was having trouble getting herself moving, and she slid into the passenger seat with a dull thump as she tossed her Prada backpack carelessly to the foot well.

"Kiss?" Jensen prompted, already half swiveled across the seat in anticipation.

Jared stretched to meet her the rest of the way, mmphing protest when Jensen tried to french her.

"It's too early in the morning," Jared claimed, pulling back to slouch down in her seat.

"You brushed your teeth," Jensen countered. "That's like an invitation for tongue. Want me to swing by Starbucks before school? If Jay doesn't get her coffee, the world's going to end."

Jared grunted, arms folded so tightly they pinched her full bosom.

"Starbucks it is," Jensen decided, steering her big black car down the drive. "You're still upset about Poland, I see."

"Shouldn't I be?" Jared burst out, glaring at the frosted lawn and the gloom of seething gray clouds overhead. It was hardly the most wonderful time of year, she mused wretchedly, thinking back to the conversation with her father that had ensued later the night before. She had pleaded, bargained, and asked him to buy another ticket for Jensen if there was absolutely no getting out of going to Poland. Gerald had refused, saying Jensen would want to be with her family, and Jared would be coming along to visit her own.

Sassing back that seeing them for the previous ten years hadn't seemed a priority until Jared had gotten herself a girlfriend had only gotten herself sent up to her room with no dessert.

"If you're still upset, I'm going to do my best to improve the mood, that's all," Jensen replied.

"Sorry to bring you down," Jared grumbled, sliding down in her seat until she could barely see over the high dash of the Truck.

"Jared," Jensen said very seriously, "if I weren't driving right now, I'd jump you and show you exactly what 'down' means to me."

A smile twitched at Jared's mouth for that.

They did stop by the drive-through Starbucks on the way to school and Jensen treated her to a venti iced vanilla latte and a breakfast sandwhich, which improved Jared's mood to the point she was almost feeling human again by the time they arrived. Jensen walked her to her locker and held her drink and pastry bag as Jared shucked off her leather jacket and stowed it on a hook inside.

"Oh," Jensen said in a markedly different tone. "I see how it's going to be."

Jared glanced down her front. She was wearing a red t-shirt with white lettering across the front that proclaimed 'Why be merry? I'm gay enough,' in capital letter font. "What?" Jared challenged, swapping out some books from her locker before taking her food and drink from Jensen again. "It's not like I'm declaring a war on Christmas. I don't have to be happy about it, is all."

Jensen sighed and looped an arm around her shoulders. "Part of learning to appreciate the joys of Christmas," she confided, leaning in until their heads were together, "is letting yourself be open to seeing the up sides to your experiences."

"The up side of leaving you?" Jared replied, in a small voice.

"Jay..." Jensen said, and stopped, and sighed. "I know you're upset about it, and I don't want to be apart any more than you do, but you're going to visit your grandparents. That's a good thing, you know?"

"I haven't seen them in about seven or eight years," Jared said, and squeaked when Jensen leaned in and nipped at her earlobe.

"All the more reason," Jensen replied. "You can Skype me from Poland. I'll give you a special show."

"A sexy show?"

"No way; I charge for that. Though if you're very nice instead of naughty, it might be a topless show."

Jared was distracted throughout the day with thoughts of the argument she'd had the night before with her dad, as well as the dreaded prospect of leaving Jensen for so long. She had checked her email after Jensen had left and found the promised itinerary from Gerald in her inbox. They would be flying out the weekend before Christmas, and would be away in the wilds of Poland for three weeks.Three weeks. She had skulked around the edges of high school existence for long enough to know that a separation of three weeks could prove insurmountable for the most devoted of couples.

The seed of doubt had nothing to do with her beautiful girlfriend, with her warm green eyes and dazzling smile. It was Jared herself, too used to ghosting through life instead of living it.

There was also the matter of certain rumors she'd heard before she had gotten together with Jensen, enough of a compendium of escapades to give Jared second and third thoughts before she'd accepted Jensen's advances.

Jared doodled in the margins of her notebooks instead of listening to lectures, and tried to remember the faces of her grandparents. She would have to haul out the albums that had been packed away in an upstairs bedroom, if she could find the right box after years of moving Padalecki family things from one place to another, year after year. Even labels might not help if she wasn't sure how it had been categorized. 'Memories.' 'Spare room paraphernalia.' 'Pieces of childhood,' gone and near-forgotten. The photos in Jared's life, few and far between, were stored digitally now. There were no pictures on the walls of the mother long gone or the family they had visited, before Gerald had gotten wrapped up in his work to the exclusion of most other considerations.

She set aside her notebook with a snap when the bell rang, rousing from her thoughts as sluggish as though she'd been dreaming.

They would leave next weekend and Jared would make the most of it. She squared her shoulders as she stacked her things away and slipped them into her backpack. Instead of trying to grasp on to the memory of faces she couldn't recall, she would focus ahead on the prospect of those arms wrapping her up in a hug, fixing on all the little details that would cement the memory within her this time, instead of allowing it to fade.

Once Jared emerged from her classroom, adjusting to the flow of traffic that jammed the hall, she squeaked as arms encircled her from behind, all but throttling her with enthusiasm.

"Missed ya," Jensen breathed in her ear.

Jared smiled, the chaotic anxiety within her settling into calm as Jensen hugged her and stole a brief smooch behind her ear. "Missed you more," she replied, turning around in Jensen's arms to face her. She pulled in a resolved breath and gave her a smile. "I'm going to go to Poland for Christmas and I'm going to make the best of it."

"That's my girl," Jensen praised her, surging into her arms and squashing their breasts together.

Jared hummed in her throat and nuzzled into the hug, her breath quickening. They'd had their fair share of stealing into bathrooms in between classes, or free periods, but it seemed so scuzzy and desperate that she tried to keep Jensen's nimble hands out of her panties when they were on school grounds, at least. She worked her fingers beneath the drape of Jensen's boyshort hair and stood inhaling her addictive scent, part coconut from her gel and a hint of sandalwood and patchouli, both of which Jared had never liked but on Jensen they melded into something new and essential to her.

"Let's go have lunch," Jared suggested. "Before..."

"Stop making out in the halls!" someone cried out as the hallway traffic surged around them, full of people headed for cafeterias or rushing for their next class or, in the case of seniors, eager to get the hell off campus for the next forty-five minutes.

"Yeah, I don't have my camera on me," another wit added.

"My cell phone's got a cam--"

"Let's get out of here," Jensen suggested, snaring Jared around the waist and guiding her into step with foot traffic.

"Perverts, like they've never seen two girls make out before," Jared sniffed.

"Yeah, that's what Youtube is for," Jensen concluded.

Side by side, they sauntered into the student center on the second floor, which many students used for their eating area during the lunch period if they'd brought their own lunches. Jensen's – and now Jared's – circle of friends came and went. Some days the tables were crowded, other days less so as alliances shifted and arrangements changed; people had to grab lunch, or hurry to finish homework, or got detained for make-up work. The student center was near deserted for now as everyone took themselves to the library in a frantic last-ditch effort to cram. Today they took themselves to their accustomed table and Jensen seated herself, tugging Jared down into her lap.

"I can't eat like this," Jared protested, trying to push up from Jensen's muscular thighs, which was difficult considering the arm around her waist.

"Sure you can," Jensen said, resting her chin on Jared's shoulder. "I promised you could put your bottom on anything of mine, whenever, didn't I?"

Jared choked on a laugh. "Yeah, but if I keep sitting here like this, someone's going to see up my skirt. Now, if that's okay with you..."

The arm around her middle retracted, leaving Jared free to get up. She pressed a kiss to Jensen's temple as she did. Love you, the affection welled up within her, for no reason at all – every reason, really, which was the best kind. She dropped into the seat beside her and rummaged for her lunch: a sandwich and some sliced fruit packed away into a black Sanrio Badtz-Maru bento container.

"No one gets a peek up that skirt but me," Jensen declared.

Jared grinned over at her. "So what culinary masterpiece have you got for lunch today?"

Jensen shrugged, unzipping her backpack. "Some leftovers, I guess."

"But they always look so good," Jared purred, draping herself over Jensen's shoulder as the blue thermal bag, velcro'd shut, emerged.

"Trade you," Jensen said. She turned her head fast enough Jared eeped, as their mouths brushed within kissing range.

"Oh my god, what a scandal," a new voice said; a high, babyish voice that made Jared stiffen in dislike. "Do you two need a room, or can other people sit here?"

Jared sighed and straightened in her seat, giving Jensen a brief eyeroll.

"Whatever," Jensen said, gesturing at the empty table. "It's a free student center."

"I didn't know if you were being exclusive, or whatever," Danneel Harris continued in her purposefully breathy tones that always put Jared on edge. With her long auburn curls and the cheerleader's uniform that she had a tendency to wear even on days that weren't game days, she was a member of the popular circle by virtue of looks and social status, but there was something about her that set Jared's teeth on edge, like a cat near water.

Jensen made a noncommittal noise.

"Like, the two of you were looking awfully cozy," Danneel said, seating herself and setting down an aluminum lunchbox with a clink.

"Are you still pissed we used the spare room at your house during last week's kegger?" Jensen asked, putting a hand on Jared's sheer pany-hosed thigh. "Because I told you back then, we--"

"What?" Danneel said, all pert confusion.

"Nothing!" Jared said, summoning up a blinding smile. To her chagrin, Jensen could talk her way into Jared's panties just about anywhere after 2.5 drinks. That didn't mean she wanted Danneel knowing or thinking about it.

Jared nudged closer to Jensen as they unpacked their lunches.

"Nice shirt," Danneel said, and Jared's head swung up. The other girl had her lips pursed and she didn't look as though it had been a compliment, exactly.

Jared quirked her mouth in response. "Nice cheerleader's outfit," she responded, and Jensen snorted under her breath beside her.

Danneel huffed and crossed her legs, flipping her shiny chromatic hair over her shoulder.

"So, what can I get you for Christmas?" Jared asked, leaning in toward Jensen. She tried to ignore Danneel, nibbling on a baby carrot across from them, all wide eyes and open ears. Jared had put off this kind of shopping for the last minute, as usual, reasoning she could get most of what she needed from the internet.

"Don't want anything," Jensen replied, twitching her nose and shaking her head, a few shaggy strands of gelled bangs fell brushing Jared's cheek.

"Come on," Jared persisted. "I'm going to get you something – do you have a wish list? Just let me know, so I've got a selection..."

Jensen kept shaking her head. "Nah," she denied. "I don't need anything, Jay, it's fine."

"You have to want something," Jared said, frustrated. She pulled back, momentarily irked with Jensen's stubbornness.

"Well, I don't," Jensen returned. She patted Jared's thigh and got to her feet. "Gonna get a Coke from the machine, do you want something?"

"Ooh, I'd like a Vitamin Water!" Danneel said, lifting a slim hand decked out with a chunky gold ring.

Jensen smirked down at Jared, touching her chin. "And something for my baby?"

Jared pursed her lips, her brows slanting down in immediate disapproval of the nickname. "Don't want anything," she mimicked Jensen's earlier assertion, and her scowl deepened as Jensen chuckled.

"You're going to be away for Christmas," Jensen said, cupping Jared's jaw before stooping to press a brief peck between Jared's gathered brows. "We don't need to exchange gifts, okay?"

She departed for the vending machines, and Jared stared forlornly after.

Jared was determined to buy Jensen something. In her world, affection was betokened with the receipt of lavish gifts. The more extravagant the gift, the more she was loved – or the more Gerald had screwed up, sometimes.

Danneel was scooting closer to the table and Jared turned her frown in the cheerleader's direction.

"So you're leaving?" Danneel wanted to know, her breathy, babyish voice taking on an edge that Jared had never heard before.

"Yeah, for three weeks," Jared said glumly, before lifting her gaze from her sandwich to meet Danneel's avaricious brown eyes.

"Sounds like Jensen will need some comfort while you're out of town," Danneel observed with an unsettling little smile hovering on her pink-glossed lips. "I've been wondering how long it would take for Jensen to get back to her date-roulette ways."

Jared's scowl deepened. She couldn't help but think, looking over at red, perfectly-groomed Danneel with her pale tan and her thin and her gorgeous heart-shaped face, that this was the kind of girl who ought to be Jensen's type. Someone golden and suitable for Jensen, someone with status – Danneel was head cheerleader. She could dance and she was straightforward in a way that Jared wasn't, clumsy, prudish and slapping Jensen's wandering hands away in public.

"Besides," Danneel added, leaning forward until the school logo creased across her breasts. "I've been wanting to give Jensen another try."

Jared's jaw dropped. "You've slept with Jen before?"

"Mm," Danneel hummed, raising a challenging dark brow.

Jared's day was taking a distinct turn for the worst, despite all her resolve.


	4. The Ackles House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared goes home with Jensen....sex ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More sex. And its sort of graphic.   
> By the way in this chapter we see Jensen's family for the first time and i have switched some ages around. Now Jared and Jensen are about 18/17 their in their senior year. And Josh and Mackenzie are in this story but their way younger than Jensen making her the older sibling.

The Ackles house was the kind of haven that Jared had never known, warm and welcoming, but Jensen and Jared didn't get to have sex there. Much.

When Jared introduced Jensen to her father Gerald as her girlfriend, Gerald's response had been "Make sure to have safe sex; I'm too young and dapper to be a grandfather," and he'd ruffled Jared's hair at her indignant squawk and left them to their own devices. Jared had bought Jensen a pizza and they'd made out on the couch afterward, having the house to themselves.

When Jensen had introduced Jared to her mother Donna as her girlfriend, the words 'my beautiful soulmate' might have been involved, and Donna had promptly greeted Jared as a member of the family. That had been followed by a correspondingly domestic dinner and they hadn't gotten a moment alone for themselves during the rest of night. 

Jensen's house was busy in a way Jared had never known, being too used to the echoing empty spaces of the Padalecki three-storied mansion. From couch in the den to bed upstairs, they had been crowded out and hemmed in by noisy siblings, dogs, and inquisitive parents. Jared had had her attention full trying to keep Jensen's hand from stealing into her shirt.

Jensen Ackles was Jared's gravity well, the one thing she had proved happily unable to escape, and Jared found it impossible to tell her 'no' and make it stick. They sometimes had a hell of a fun time when Jared tried, though.

It was the family aspect of the Ackles household in which Jared, raised by the lone wolf that was Gerald, gloried every time she visited Jensen's place, and it also gave her the chance to say 'no' to Jensen. That was a word her girlfriend didn't hear often, and usually ignored when she did.

"Nnn...no," Jared protested, as Jensen's hand attempted to migrate north up the plane of Jared's back in a clear bid to unhook her bra.

"I want to suck on your nipples," Jensen said huskily into her ear, and if Jared hadn't been half-reclined against the pillows on Jensen's bed, that would have caused her knees to weaken and deposit her onto the nearest surface. Jensen's low-voiced murmurs were fast becoming one of Jared's hottest aphrodisiacs.

"Oh," Jared said, her voice weak, all other thought chased from her head as Jensen's words kick-started a smoldering need in her groin.

"Come on, let me," Jensen urged, slipping her thumb beneath Jared's bra strap and rubbing over the skin beneath in teasing, rhythmic movements.

"No, we can't," Jared said, making a pushing motion but all she did was settle her hands on Jensen's breasts. "Jen, no."

Jensen leaned into Jared's touch, chaining soft kisses along her neck. "I love you," she murmured fondly, taking her hand from Jared's bra and smoothing down the lower plane of her back instead.

"Oh...ohh, me too," Jared moaned, cinching her legs around Jensen's waist, resting one foot at the seat of Jensen's jeans. Her afternoon had drastically improved once they had gotten out of school and Jensen had kissed her senseless the moment they'd climbed into the truck. It was only getting better now that Jensen was paying her such sweet attention. "But we can't do that here; your Mom and sibs will be home any--"

She turned her head as the slam of a door reached her ears.

"Ugh," Jensen uttered, pulling her hand out of Jared's shirt and resting her head on Jared's chest.

"—minute," Jared concluded, stroking the back of Jensen's neck beneath her short blonde hair. "Want a head scratch?"

"Hmm," Jensen hummed, caressing down Jared's side and down to her hip, keeping it over Jared's clothes. "Wanna have sex."

Jared kissed the top of Jensen's head, unclutching her legs from around her waist and sliding her legs down the bed with quiet-whispering shumps. Her black skirt was all but ridden up around her waist, but her black sheer panty-hose were a barrier for modesty – and Jensen's wandering hands.

"I know," she said agreeably, "but we can't, so long as--"

A flurry of thuds and stamping noises stormed up the staircase just outside Jensen's room, and Jared tried to hide her face against Jensen's shoulder. She closed her legs and Jensen tugged her skirt back down.

The door crashed open in the next instant.

"We're hooooome!" declared Josh, Jensen's eleven-year old brother. "You wanna play X-Box? I wanna play co-op...oh, hi, Jared."

Jared gave a little wave as Jensen groaned and buried her face against Jared's front.

"Go away, Josh," Jensen's muffled voice issued from between Jared's breasts. "Why'd you break into my room?"

It was a good thing she wasn't ticklish, Jared mused as she stroked Jensen's hair and tried to pretend she was a pillow, or that she wasn't there, as Josh stared at them.

"Why don't you lock your door?" Josh countered. "C'mon, you guys are just lying around. Bo-ring. Let's go play video games."

Jensen groaned again and began to shake her head from side to side against the front of Jared's shirt, making Jared squeak as her face nuzzled between the generous peaks of Jared's breasts. "I am busy doing important things."

Unseen by Josh, the hand between her body and Jared's began to creep up Jared's skirt.

Jared squeaked again and swatted at her wandering fingers.

"Cuddling is so over-rated," Josh said, his voice heavy with scorn. "Come downstairs with me!" His voice edged from wheedle into whine territory.

From the bottom of the stairs, a new voice entered the fray. "Jen? Are you home?"

"A salient question," Jared murmured, stroking Jensen's back. "You've been spending most of your free time at my place lately..."

"Gee, I wonder why," Jensen mumbled to Jared's breasts. She lifted her head up, presenting a red-faced, mussed demeanor. "It's getting crowded here, let's go."

"Aw, Jensen!" Josh whined.

"Cool it, squirt," Jensen said, swinging her legs around and grabbing Jared's hand. "I'll be around all next week and over all of winter break, okay? We can play Call of Duty until Mom chases us out of the house into the snow."

"Wicked!" Josh exclaimed, and bolted.

Jared curled up against Jensen's back, setting her head against one shoulder blade, her ear picking up the silken-winged beat of Jensen's heart. "I like it here," she murmured, hugging her girlfriend above the waist and beneath her breasts. "It's homey."

"It's crowded," Jensen shot back, sounding exasperated.

"Yeah, but...your mom cooks," Jared said against Jensen's shirt. She rubbed her cheek there before remembering she'd get foundation on the cotton fabric.

"Well," Jensen said, reaching back to pet Jared's nearest leg. "We don't have to have sex."

Jared cheeped. She climbed off the bed in a flash of legs and flirty skirt. "Okay, I'm packing up my bag, let's go; you have to drive me home anyhow!"

Jensen uttered a startled-sounding bray of laughter. "I'm glad you want to as much as I do, at least."

Jared turned with a smile, slipping her backpack over one shoulder. "All the time," she replied, her smile widening even further. "It's just that I have a sense of the appropriate."

Jensen dismissed that with a flick of her fingers. "Wait downstairs for me?" she requested, walking around the side of her bed toward the far end.

Jared raised a brow.

"It's a surprise," Jensen said demurely. "Besides, Mom likes it when you come by to say hello."

Efficiently guilted, Jared fired off an air-kiss and left the room. Jensen's sister Mackenzie was walking up the hallway, far more decorous – and quiet – than Josh, but just as nosey. Mackenzie was ten, blond, and weaseled her way past Jensen's closed door even more often than Josh did, despite the fact that both Jensen and Jared were fairly sure Mackenzie was squicked by the prospect of lesbian goings-on.

"Oh!" Mackenzie exclaimed, startling. "Hi, Jared." She froze in place beside the wall as though Jared had caught her with her hand on her wallet.

"Hey, Mack," Jared said with a smile. She headed down the stairs, trailing a hand down the banister to steady herself in case she slipped in her stockinged feet.

The Ackles house was such a stark comparison to what Jared had always thought of as home. It was more than just a house; it was lived in, there was clutter in the corners, backpacks and shoes jumbled up beside the door, a bench beside the staircase overgrown with coats and toys and other odds and ends. Jared padded down the hall to the kitchen straight past the dining room, which had a low "chandelier" with light bulbs covered with blown-glass shades, and a lace runner down the front of the dark-varnished table. There were enough spaces for six, in a family of five, so when Jared stayed over for dinner there was just enough room.

She moved into the cheery kitchen, decorated in warm browns and yellows with touches of green here and there. Donna was unloading groceries from sturdy canvas bags, and looked up as she entered the room.

"Oh, hello, Jared dear," she said pleasantly.

Whenever Donna addressed Jared in such a fashion it always gave her a warm swirl in her middle, similar to what she experienced when Jensen called her pet names but something more mellow, perhaps what someone who would know better would call maternal, or familial.

"Hello!" Jared chirped with a quick wave, similar to how she'd greeted Josh.

"Are you staying for dinner with us?" Donna asked, setting aside a box of pasta. "You know you're always welcome, right, Jared? I hate to think of you all alone in that enormous house of yours..."

"Oh, it's fine," Jared said, waving it off. "Dad comes in later and we eat together, so..."

"But not homemade," Donna fretted. "I have a casserole in the fridge if you want to take it home."

"Aw, Mom, she doesn't want that," Jensen interjected, coming through the door and hooking an arm around Jared's neck. "C'mon, we've got to go, Jared's and I have lots of homework to do. We'll see you later, okay?"

"Homework, right," Donna said, turning a 'don't bullshit me' look on the pair of them. "Okay, well, Jensen, are you having dinner over there? If not, try to be home by seven."

"No promises," Jensen said, her fingers tightening on Jared's shoulder. She steered her out of the kitchen. "Let's go while the getting is good."

Jared snickered and let herself be led.

It was already deep dark by the time the truck pulled through the gates that guarded the Padalecki estate, though the hour was still relatively early by evening standards. Jared fiddled with her phone, answering a few emails while Jensen bopped her head over her steering wheel to the tune of Sam Hunt playing softly from the speakers. She kept the music turned down, but not off as she took into consideration their differing music tastes.

Buying Jensen new music for Christmas had occurred to Jared, more than once, but she wasn't the pushy sort to try to make her girlfriend listen to her kind of music. If they were in Jared's car, they'd listen to Jared's CD collection. Otherwise, Jensen reigned behind the wheel.

Inside, they rushed from the front drive through the cold empty halls, giggling and pinching at one another, mock-tickling and Jared shrieked as Jensen got too close to a particularly sensitive spot, breaking into a run and keeping temptingly out of range. Jensen called out plaintively to her and shuffled faster, urging Jared not to be mad, she was too tempting, was all.

Jared paused against the wood of the doorframe, slanting a needy glance over her shoulders. "Jenny, don't keep me waiting," she entreated. Her room was kept on a different thermometer, and was perfectly warm in contrast to the cold halls beyond. She was comfortable pulling off her shirt and tossing it to the side as she moved into her room toward the bed.

"Oh, sexy," Jensen breathed, swaggering faster. She began to hitch her pants up as she reached the door, appeared to think better of it, and unbuttoned them as she kept moving, letting gravity do its work and stepping out of them as she continued toward Jared.

Jared giggled, toppling onto the edge of the bed to begin working off her tights as Jensen made a beeline for her, peeling out of her sports bra. "Come here, I need you," she said, beckoning with a hand.

Jensen grinned and climbed onto the bed beside her, bouncing once as though testing the springiness of the mattress, dropping her backpack right beside it as she put a hand on Jared's bare thigh. "Now can I lick your nipples?" she asked in that raspy voice from earlier.

"Yes; yes please," Jared replied hoarsely, letting Jensen lay her back amongst her many fluffy pillows. She was still half-dressed, her black skirt pushed down around her knees along with her tights, enough to bare her see through pink panties. She was wearing a bra composed of matching material, and reached behind herself to disengage the hooks. She lifted her arms up, giggling a bit as Jensen pulled it off her and threw it dramatically aside.

"There's my Jaybird," Jensen said softly, and settled between her legs. She pressed her mouth to Jared's diaphragm before kissing her way up toward one breast, pushing it up with one hand.

It surprised a moan out of Jared as Jensen licked across her nipple even though Jensen had expressed the direct intent. Their bodies pressed together as Jensen murmured softly around her mouthful and rutted against her, rubbing her belly insistently against Jared's groin.

"Oh...oh yes," Jared sighed, tangling a hand in Jensen's frosted hair.

Jensen grinned around her nipple, releasing it briefly from her control only to lick over it again with a series of quick, rough little licks, drawing a lazy circle around it before suckling it between her lips.

Jared cried out, pushing her hips up against Jensen's weight. "Feels good..." She kneaded at Jensen's shoulder with her other hand, basking in enjoyment, wanting kisses too but those could come later, if they rocked together as they had the day before.

Jensen rocked against her with a teasing rhythm as she mapped her way to the other nipple, paying that its share of attention, too. Her nimble finger teased at the cool damp nipple she'd left behind, stroking it and keeping it tightly perked.

"Ahh," Jared cried, arching her hips against Jensen's weight. She tried to tangle a leg over Jensen's but her girlfriend pushed up, stunning Jared in place momentarily with the arc of pleasure she got from that brief extra rub.

Jensen smiled down at her, eyes alight, and hovered close enough to press their nipples and bare breasts together. Jared's eyes fluttered.

"I know you like that," Jensen said hoarsely, propping above her and starting up small movements again, causing Jared to make anxious little keens. "So, there's something I want to try, okay?"

"Hmm what?" Jared mumbled, receptive to just about anything as Tom nosed at the sensitive spot beneath her ear and kissed it.

Tom sat up on the bed, patting Jared's leg before leaving her briefly. "Stay right here."

Jared murmured assent, eyes following Jensen curiously as she delved over the edge of the bed and came back with an item that looked like a bulky green jelly thimble.

"What is...?" Jared trailed off as Jensen flicked it on and it began to vibrate. "Ohh."

"Lay back and enjoy this, love," Jensen told her.

Jared thought it redundant considering she was already lying prone, but she eyed Jensen's hand with apprehension as her girlfriend draped herself half on Jared's side, half next to her, and caressed up her thigh. Jensen's nose nudged at her jaw and Jared turned her head for a kiss. They shared a long, sweet one as Jensen worked her panties down.

"Is it going in--" Jared began, and squeaked when Jensen pushed her hand in to stroke at the apex of Jared's thighs. Her eyes rolled back and her lips went slack as Jensen tongued at her mouth, pressing the vibrating finger-toy directly over her clit. Jared bucked up against Jensen's steadily moving hand, whimpering and catching at her shoulder, grabbing a handful of spiky hair. She tried to strain closer, pushing up against Jensen's hand even as she struggled to maintain the coherency of their kiss.

"Good?" Jensen murmured, her voice sounding as though it came from very far away.

"Yes...oh yes..." Jared sobbed out, her legs parting wider but hobbled, to a point, by the tights and panties and skirt wedged around her knees she kicked them off desperatly.

Jensen kissed her once more, hard, and got up, breasts swaying. Jared reached up to caress one before it moved out of range. With an insistent touch, Jensen directed Jared to swing her legs up toward her chest, giving Jensen total access to her bared private parts.

"Oh," Jared whimpered as the vibrating touch returned.

Jensen leaned down on her, causing Jared's legs to bob toward her chest and putting pressure on her hand as she rocked it into Jared, finger seeking her clit again and again as she thrust her hips in rhythmic motions.

"Oh, god," Jared moaned, and cried out from the sheer excess of pleasure as Jensen kept going, her movements never stopping. The vibrations were delivering intense jolts of sensation straight to her clit, and Jensen was ruthless in its delivery. "Jensen...Jensen!"

"Come for me," Jensen urged, gentle but inexorable as she pushed her hips against Jared and the vibrating little toy strobed against Jared's clit.

Jared exclaimed again, wordless and fervent as she began to twitch in the grasp of a powerful orgasm. It was pulled up out of her fast, much faster than she was accustomed to coming, even with Jensen's skilled hands and mouth drawing it out of her.

Jensen piled her weight atop Jared, riding the toy between them as she shuddered over Jared and pressed her legs in against her chest and took her mouth.

"Mm...nnh!" Jensen moaned against Jared's tongue as she thrust her hips down in strong unstoppable movements. The vibrator buzzed between them and Jared throbbed violently, clutching at every part of Jensen she could reach and sucking at Jensen's tongue.

It seemed to go on forever, until they were a panting heap of mingled Jared-and-Jen on the bed, mussed but still made. Jensen eased off to one side of her, flicking the toy off and dropping it to the bedspread before cupping Jared's breast and joining their mouths.

They made out with soft murmurs, facing one another on the spread. They were still half out of their clothes, Jared's underwear and stockings and skirt binding around her knees, Jensen with boxers that were pushed low enough to expose the golden triangle of hair that led to her clit.

"I liked that," Jared confessed sleepily, when Jensen parted from her at last, stroking over her side and bare hip.

Jensen pressed another kiss to her collarbone. "Good," she replied brightly, sounding pleased. She sat up again, the definition of her stomach muscles rippling beneath her skin, and Jared lazed where she was and admired her girlfriend's trim figure as Jensen reached over the side of the bed once more, rummaging in her backpack by the sound of it.

"Don't tell me..." Jared began, getting an inkling at last.

A moment later Jensen returned with a manic grin and a handful of slim blue bullet-shaped vibrator. "Look," she said, brandishing it proudly. "It's shaped nothing like a boy. I thought you might be open to giving it a try?"

Jared moaned weakly and settled back in her place, lacing her hands over her bare stomach and laying her feet over Jensen's thighs. "Get my clothes off, then, and we'll see how 'open' I am."

Jensen's blinding smile was, as ever, worth the surrender.

There were many circumstances under which Jared tried to tell Jensen no, but when it came to initiating new pleasures, she never had a chance. The specter of all their troubles fell away as their lips and hands – and bodies – came together. Jensen was her irresistible force, and denial was useless as well as plain undesirable against that mutually gratifying assault.


	5. Suspicions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared starts getting frustrated as she tries to wrangle Jensen's Christmas wishlist.

At school, Jensen referred to Jared as 'my girlfriend' and Jared called Jensen 'my stalker,' but each of them used the same tell-tale besotted tone, so no one was fooled.

"Hey, where's your stalker?" Tom asked her in a teasing tone as he slid into the seat on her left, opposite side of where Jensen normally sat.

Jared made an exasperated noise in her throat. "Out lurking," she replied with a wave of her hand. They had different classes throughout the day, and their mutual English one was the one across the building from Jensen's previous class. "She won't tell me what she wants for Christmas."

Tom chuckled warmly, propping an elbow on his desk as he shook his sweep of well-tended chestnut hair away from his face. He played bass guitar, Jared knew, and once upon a time he'd gone to music school with Jensen and Jared's actual lurker friend, Sumner.

"Chances are, she probably has, already," Tom advised. "I'm sure she didn't phrase it as a gift request, exactly, but she put the thought out there."

Jared leaned against the edge of her desk until it cut into her stomach. "Hmm." She set her chin in her hands. She'd given thought to Jensen's suggestion from the other day of a double-ended strap-on, but that wasn't exactly the kind of thing one would want to open beside the tree on Christmas morning.

"Think about it," Tom said with a brief wink.

"Are you coming onto me?" Jared responded with a demure smile. "You know my stalker doesn't like that kind of thing..."

"Who's coming onto you?" a familiar voice demanded, and Jensen swung a leg over the seat beside Jared. With a crack of her knuckles, Jensen set a fist into her opposite palm and narrowed her eyes at Tom. "I'm pretty sure I can take him."

"Won't be necessary," Tom asserted, raising both hands. "We were just talking Christmas."

Jensen chuckled. "With my Jay? Let me know your secret."

"Presents," Jared tacked on, sulky. "I'm obtuse and I need to be told what to get." She wished Tom hadn't said that. Now she'd be racking her brain for every conversation she'd had with Jensen for weeks, trying to figure out the gift idea that had been spoken when she'd failed to note it.

"Nothing, I already told you that," Jensen said, her mouth flattening in an annoyed line. Her eyes flicked to meet Jared's before focusing on the front of the class.

"I can't not get you something--" Jared began, and cut herself short as the teacher came into the classroom and shut the door with a decisive bang.

She stewed all through class and doodled pictures of ornaments, the tinsel Jensen had wanted to drape around the tree, and found herself considering a gift of schlocky tree-trimming blown glass. It wasn't personal enough; and besides, Jensen would only get to use it once a year. Jensen didn't need more baseball caps; she had a ton and Jared didn't even know everything in her inventory. She'd thought about getting her new boxers, but that seemed...not sexy, somehow. She was going to have to finesse some kind of wishlist out of her.

Jared had even tried Amazon, but Jensen hadn't even been registered with a wishlist there, or if she was it had been private.

When the bell rang, where most students jumped to their feet at once, Jared remained at her desk instead, finishing up her scrollwork on the doodle that she had started at the upper corner of the page.

"Are you mad?" Jensen asked her, jewel eyes watchful, tongue flicking at the corner of her mouth where her new lip ring resided.

Jared produced a scoffing noise in her throat. "Me, mad?" Her chair scraped away from the table. "Now, what would make you say that?"

"Because you're acting mad," Jensen replied, forthright about it. "And I'd like to spend the lunch period with my girlfriend."

Jared huffed, cramming her notebook into her backpack and shoving the zipper closed so fast that she almost jammed it. "Go and find her, then."

"Baby," Jensen said, sounding pained. She came around the desk that separated them and stood in front of Jared, lifting up a hand as though to cup her jaw. "I already told you, I don't need anything. Can't you accept that?"

With a quiet hum in her throat and an arch of her brow, Jared remained fixed in place when her instinct told her to pull away, because she was still mad. "Come shopping with me tonight," she said, changing her angle of attack. Jensen's warm, calloused fingers stroked along her jaw and Jared tipped her head into the caress.

At that, Jensen looked displeased. "Shopping," she protested. "That's what the internet is for."

Jared folded her arms. "I haven't gotten a single thing for my relatives in Europe, and I don't care if they're not expecting anything; I will have something for them when I step off that plane."

"You're so single-minded," Jensen said, sidling close enough to hook an arm around her shoulders. "It's like some super power with you."

Jared snorted. "You don't complain when I'm single-mindedly making you come."

"Hey," Tom's voice said behind them, pointed. "I'm still here."

Jensen laughed. "Yeah, and I'll bet you wish you could say that, during."

"God, yes," Tom admitted.

Jared laughed, turning her head to find Jensen warmly chuckling beside her, and they went to the student center arm in arm. Balance was restored for now, because Jared had a plan.

Over the lunch hour, clustered in a huge group with Chad and Tom and an assorted half-dozen of the others who hovered at the edge of Jensen's circle, Jared couldn't help but try again. She set aside the lacquered wooden chopsticks she'd been using to pick the peas out of her vegetable fried rice and leaned against Jensen's shoulder.

Jensen put an arm around her automatically, nudging close to kiss Jared's temple.

Jared was pleased with those sorts of public displays of affection, so long as Jensen didn't try to press her any further. Territory below the bellybutton was verboten and would require a trip to the bathroom. The chestal area was strictly off limits while they were on school grounds unless there was accidental contact, because Jared was loud with Jensen's mouth on her nipples.

"If you could have any one thing for Christmas," Jared breathed into Jensen's ear, not above placing a strategic hand on her thigh, "what would it be?"

Jensen turned her head and gave Jared a compressed-mouth glare. "Don't push this," she warned. "You know, all I want is you." She bit her lip as though conceding she'd gone too far.

Jared shoved at Jensen's thigh, scooting out of range. "Well, you can't have me," she replied, her own annoyance lowering like an instant cloud. As with the dreadful weather that plagued Chicago this time of year, her anger at being taken from Jensen had only been swept away and left clear skies for a little while. It was ready to descend once more. "I'll be in Poland that whole week, and after. But, if you want anything else..."

Jensen shook her head, turning her attention to what appeared to be a large hunk of shepherd's pie. "Don't need anything."

Jared's thoughts drifted, once more, to the double-ended strap-on that Jensen had mentioned. Delicate heat rose into her face. Her experience with Jensen's vibrator had been good, so good that she knew she wanted more. She pictured Jensen's weight slung across her while that delicious deep ache pushed within her, and Jensen's ecstatic panting expression tipped her over the edge...

That could be nice, much more than nice, and she found herself far more open to the idea than the first time Jensen had brought it up.

There was still enough time if she got express shipping...and then it could be a promise for the two of them, something to set aside and enjoy when Jared got back.

"Stop sulking," Jensen said, petting Jared's nearest leg and the cotton fabric of her tight black leggings.

"Wasn't," Jared denied, giving Jensen surprised eyes as she tugged her plaid flannel down. She had been far, far away, but in contemplation of the delights to be had of Jensen and the toy she had suggested the other day. It had driven thoughts of her pique at Jensen's stubbornness right out of her mind.

"Do we really have to go shopping after school?" Jensen wanted to know, sounding plaintive.

Jared pitched the question back at her, "I don't know, Jensen, do you really want orgasms after school?"

Jensen's eyes darkened and Jared was pleased that her rhetoric had made such an impression.

"I'm at your command," Jensen said, scooting her chair several notches closer, until she could wind her arm around Jared's shoulders again. "So long as you're at mine, afterward." She aimed a devoted leer in Jared's direction.

Jared made a scoffing noise, but said nothing to deny it. That was more or less what she'd had in mind, after all.

When Jensen got up to get a Coke, Jared experienced a resurgence of her plague of doubt from the day before. Like a swarm of gnats, the thought of Jensen leaving her, or hooking up with someone else while she was on break, wouldn't quite go away. She hadn't told Jensen, of course. I know I'm not the brightest but I'd never be stupid enough to cheat on you, Jensen had told her in the wooing phase of their relationship.

It was satisfying to hear, but the certainty of never seeing it play out in real life was a good deal less rock solid. Jared had read and seen enough to know that many people were faithless, and a statistically significant number cheated on their significant others – or were cheated upon.

Jensen had promised, but would she be able to stand fast on that when she wasn't joining Jared regularly in her bed?

Danneel's dark brown eyes had offered a challenge, and Jared found herself lacking when stacked up against the assets that the pretty blond cheerleader had to offer.

How long could she, Jared, keep her Jensen satisfied? Especially when Jensen had known so many varied pleasures with girls that were probably all too willing to fall right into her lap.

"Careful, Jaybird," Chad told her from across the table. "You look like you're about to hone diamonds with that thousand-yard stare."

Jared glanced up, startled. "I wasn't..." she began vaguely, looking around for Danneel, then for Jensen. She shook her head and pushed up from her seat. "Gonna find my stalker."

"You're bass-ackwards again," Chad called after her, though his tone was affectionate. "Usually the object of the stalking doesn't have to go looking for the person committing the act."

"Well, she's not a very good one, then, is she?" Jared retorted over her shoulder.

Wherever Jared was, there was Jensen. For the past three months, it had seemed to be the rule in Jared's life. Her stomach twisted painfully as she contemplated a time when that might not be so, for the two of them. Not because Jared had uprooted and moved, but because Jensen herself had decided not to be with Jared anymore.

Like saying 'no,' Jared knew there would never be a time she'd make that decision where Jensen was concerned.

There were different pockets of people scattered throughout the student center. Jared passed by a few geeks hunched over a laptop, giving the floppy-haired one a wave when he glanced up. He bobbed his head in response. She passed a couple of hipsters sharing black earbuds for an mp3 player, one of them crooning along softly to the music.

The Coke vending machines stood against the far wall, but Jensen was nowhere to be seen beside them. Jared folded her arms tightly and began casting around this way and that for her lovely stalker. If she found Danneel macking on her woman, the civility was going out the window like the single-glove look she'd played around with last year. She had nice, sharp nails and a willingness to use them, as Jensen's shoulders could attest.

She passed a recessed nook and did a double-take. Jensen stood beside one of the bean bag chairs, hip cocked out, having a word with Sumner. The boy was turtled on his back in the bean bag chair beside Jensen, fingers laced over his white t-shirt, his expression so blank he appeared startled as Jensen gestured with animation.

Jared headed for them, raising a brow when Sumner raised a finger and drew it across his throat in the 'kill' signal.

Jensen's loose bang bounced as she nodded, and she turned toward Jared, her face lighting up at once. "Jay! You missed me, didn't you?"

"Erm...sure," Jared said vaguely, staring past Jensen as she connected gazes with Sumner. Her lurker friend would want nothing to do with popular Jensen, so Jensen must have sought him out, for whatever reason.

"You want a Coke, too?" Jensen asked, looping her arm around Jared's waist and guiding her toward the vending machines.

"What did you want with Sumner?" Jared returned, slanting a glance over her shoulder at Sumner, who was pulling a face so straight, a ruler could probably be drawn plumb level along his lips.

"Change for a dollar," Jensen claimed, grasping a pocket and jiggling it, eliciting a chime of coins from within.

"Uh...huh," Jared said, biting her lip and knitting her brows at Jensen.

Jensen gave her a smooth, innocent smile and squeezed her arm tight around Jared, tweaking the underside of her breast.

Jared cheeped and slapped at her fingers, thoroughly diverted.

"So," Jensen said in an intimate, very interested tone. "Any chance we'll be going someplace that has a Victoria's Secret where you can model their winter line for me?"

"You're a pervert," Jared said, and because that was nothing new, she added to make it very clear, "we're not having sex in any mall store fitting rooms."

"Damn," Jensen lamented, but leaned in to steal a kiss. "Well, any afternoon spent with you is always worth my time."

"Save it," Jared said dryly. "You're already getting lucky. ...Probably."

She would try not to make it contingent on acquiring a Christmas wishlist for her Jensen. At the very least, though, she'd be getting in some good shopping and Jensen's pain for the whole girly process would go a long way to assuaging Jared's irritation over being thwarted thus far.


	6. Christmas Gifts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared and Jensen get in a fight, but Jensen cant stay away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been so long! My computer is so messed up! only a couple more chapters to go

The days passed too fast, and there wasn't enough time left for everything Jared wanted to do as they barreled through the last flurry of finals and pre-holiday merriment. Before Jared quite realized, she was standing beside an open suitcase with Jensen sprawled out beside her watching Jared select outfits to throw into her cases for traveling.

"It's going to be cold in Poland," Jensen cautioned her, as Jared held up a short-sleeved shirt that showed her womanly curves.

"I know," Jared said absently, looking everywhere but Jensen as she folded it up and tossed it atop her black skinny jeans. Jensen was gorgeous and half-naked on her bed after a frantic session during which they'd clung together and humped desperately, seeking the solace they could provide one another by hand and mouth, for now. If Jared looked up, she was going to want to have Jensen all over again, and they were running out of time. "They'll have heating indoors, though, and I've got my peacoat. And the fur-lined leather trench coat."

"Fur is..." Jensen began, censorious as the first time she'd seen Jared pull that out of her closet.

"Fur is murder, I know," Jared sighed, holding up a slim hand. "But it's a gorgeous coat and the fur they trimmed it from is already dead and it was a gift, okay? I can't just throw it out."

"Sure, okay," Jensen grumbled, getting up from the bed to draw her jeans on over her boxers.

"Wait...you're not leaving, are you?" Jared wanted to know, her throat clutching tight. She'd hoped that they could have another bout of lovemaking after she was done filling her suitcases with enough to tide her over for the weeks that she'd be gone.

And, there was also...

Jared's foot nudged a wrapped gift tucked away beneath the cream-colored dust ruffle at the foot of her canopy bed. There was something she wanted to give Jensen before they were parted. It was something she was sure Jensen wanted, and at the same time, it was something Jared knew would serve as a reminder of everything they could share once Jared returned.

"Mom told me to pick up some things on my way home," Jensen said, lifting a hand in apology before she grabbed her red sweater she got in the mens section at American Eagle and pulled it on. Color-coordinated as ever, Jensen was wearing a red cap trimmed with white fake fur, rather like a cross between a Santa cap. "Much as I'd love to stay and distract you from your packing, I should stop off at home first, at least."

"Oh. Right." Jared's shoulders slumped, defeated. She pulled her foot away from the package beneath the bed.

"Now, if you want me to come back later..." Jensen began, swinging around as she finished adjusting her bra over her round, firm breasts.

Jared nodded, biting her lip.

"Besides, I'm sure you've got a handle on which skirt looks best with which shirt..." Jensen said, giving her a teasing half-smile. "It's not like I'm much use to you, there."

Jared nodded, sucked in a breath, and looked down toward the foot of her bed. She blurted, "You'll still be waiting for me when I get back, right?"

Jensen's eyes went wide as she regarded Jared, speechless for an instant as she blinked. "Of course I will!" she exclaimed. "Jay, what's up...why this question?"

Jared shrugged one shoulder, uncomfortable in her own skin as a sick burn started up in her middle. "Danneel kind of said, or well, she implied..."

"Danneel is a ho," Jensen said at once, stepping close to Jared, putting a hand on her arm.

"Oh? And you'd know about that?" Jared shot back before she thought, pulling away from Jensen's touch. Danneel's smirk rose up in her mind's eye. She'd never thought, before, about the girls Jensen had slept with before they'd gotten together. There had been the implication that it was a lot. Jared had never had any faces to associate with the prospect before Danneel, though, and it gave substance and reality to the fact of Jensen with someone else. "She seems to think you'll be 'all over her again' when I leave for Europe."

Jensen's face turned stormy. "I don't want to talk about Danneel," she said, her face closing down. "I'm here with you, and she's got nothing to do with you."

"But I'm leaving," Jared said quietly, almost inaudibly. She folded her arms around herself in a cheerless hug. Jared knew all too well how it worked. There would be a Christmas celebration, or a New Year's celebration. Everyone would be invited, and Jensen would go, of course, because there'd be beer. There would be a keg, low lighting, a crowded dance floor, a comfortable niche away from the press of bodies.

The flash of an image pierced through her, Danneel twined around Jensen beneath a sprig of mistletoe, and it was sharp enough to make Jared bite her lip and regard the floor, pained.

"That's what this is about?" Jensen's voice, high and incredulous, brought Jared's gaze back up. Jensen finished donning her clothes with quick, jerky movements, standing there with her hands on her hips. "You're going on vacation, and you don't trust me to wait."

"It's not...it's not that I don't..." Jared began weakly. It all sounded so feeble when Jensen spoke it aloud, spitting the words so fiercely at Jared that she wanted to flinch.

Jensen gave her a long, level look. "If you don't trust me," she said, her voice dreadfully quiet, "then maybe you ought to think about whether you want to be with me."

Jared's mouth dropped open. "Of course I--"

"Because I love you," Jensen continued heatedly, "and I've made sure you know that, Jared, but I've never heard the same from you."

"What? But that's not--" Jared floundered, completely sidelined from the argument they'd been having. She felt as though Jensen had driven them off the track into the swamp of Jared's insecurities. Though the argument they had been getting into had been initiated by her own fear that Jensen would leave her, after all, so Jared supposed it was all the same. "No, that's not true." Cold fear congealed in her stomach, weighing it down. Jensen was talking as though she really would leave her, and all she was trying to do was keep her, even as Jared herself left the country for far too long.

"You've never said," Jensen said softly. Her eyes flickered from Jared's to a far point of the room. "I've been waiting for it."

"I...I...but, you've said it, and I've..." Jared trailed off, her hands grasping at the air. She felt the same way. Her heart was alight in her chest whenever Jensen told her she loved her.

"You've said 'me too,'" Jensen finished. Her green eyes burned as she met Jared's gaze again. "That's what you say when you want to avoid letting the other person down, you know? You don't want to leave them without a response...but you're not saying the same thing."

Jared's mouth worked. "Jensen, I..."

Jensen began to nod as Jared's throat closed.

It was too much pressure. It was something buried so deep inside of her she would have to claw it out and even then, she was afraid. If she let that emotion free, if she exposed it to the light of day, it was out there and she couldn't take it back, she couldn't keep it safe inside of her.

It would be Jensen's, to cherish or destroy.

"I swore to myself I'd never push you, Jared," Jensen said quietly. "And I'm not going to do that now, even though you're sure as hell pushing me – about something I've never given you cause to doubt, and never will. So I think I'd better leave."

Jared's mouth was still open. She closed it, swallowing dumbly. "Jensen, please."

"I'll see you later," Jensen told her, picking up her coat from the nearby chair.

Jared's feet were rooted to the floor. "Jensen--"

Jensen paused in the doorway, her dark brows raised inquiringly.

Even though it meant Jensen leaving, the words still wouldn't come. I love you. Three words, so simple and irrevocable to Jared, because she refused to ever make a promise that couldn't be broken, and that was what those words meant to her. Once you loved someone, there was no taking it back.

And Jared was so afraid. Not of Jensen, but of herself. How could she be that much to anyone?

Jensen broke into a breathtaking smile even as her eyes shimmered. She reached up to twitch the fuzzy white brim of her Santa cap. "Goodnight, Jay."

"Goodnight," the word squeaked out. Her voice would work for that. She dropped her gaze, ashamed, and twisted her hands together.

There was only one day more, and she wouldn't see Jensen for three weeks. She couldn't even voice how much she loved her.

Jared slumped down to the floor beside her suitcases, mired in absolute despair. Jensen was gone, and not only had she failed to communicate her intentions – I want to be with you, I want to keep you, I want to make sure no one else can take you away from me – but even worse, it sounded as though Jensen's words had been the presage to a break-up. It was true that Jensen told her on all occasions or none that she loved her.

Those were three words that Jared didn't have much practice saying aloud, let alone delivering in any other fashion.

Her eyes were hot, but when Jared scrubbed angrily at the back of one eye with her wrist, the only thing that came away was a smear of black makeup. I love you, and I can't do this anymore. They were one step away from that point, and it was Jared's fault.

The ring of her phone in the stillness of the room was startling, and Jared's head jerked up. She'd gotten a new phone from Gerald as a pre-Christmas gift, a phone with worldwide calling capabilities, and it was still set to the shrill old-fashioned rotary style ringer that had come as the default ring-tone.

She scrambled to her feet and rushed across the room, hoping it would be Jensen calling from the car, assuring her that she'd come back. Jensen was usually first to apologize, even when Jared was first to blow up. Jared was counting on that generous nature, otherwise she wasn't quite sure how to bail herself out of the mess that she, herself, had created.

Sure, Jensen had been with other girls before. She hadn't so much as looked at anyone else the entire time she had been with Jared, though, and why had Jared let herself believe Danneel's words rather than her own girlfriend's actions?

"Hello?" Jared said, her voice husky as she answered the phone. She grimaced. She sounded as though she had been crying.

"Are you packing?" Gerald wanted to know.

Jared sighed and scrubbed at her face, tired and deflated. She trotted back toward her bed which had several piles of clothing on it, and scooped a folded pile of shirts into the open suitcase at her feet. "What of it?" she demanded between her teeth. "I'll be ready for the flight time tomorrow, so--"

"Belay that," Gerald interrupted.

"Huh?" Jared returned.

"Don't grunt, Jay-bear, it's not ladylike," Gerald told her. "Something has come up here at work, and I need to push our trip back. I've already exchanged the tickets, so you don't need to pack."

Jared blinked a few times and stared down into the open suitcase. "So when are we going?" she asked, bracing herself. Gerald said he'd exchanged the tickets, not canceled entirely.

"Next week," Gerald said. "We'll use up the rest of your break from school – oh, and we can take that girlfriend of yours, if she wants to come and her parents will let her."

"Oh," Jared said, in a very small voice.

"That is, if she has a passport--"

"That's not the issue," Jared interjected, her heart so full of that look Jensen had given her in the doorway. She had looked as though she was saying goodbye for real, and hadn't wanted to. Jensen had a passport, Jared knew – her family had been to London, and a family trip to Australia. But would she want to use it, now? "She...may not want to go with me, after some of the things I said today."

No matter what Danneel wanted, Jensen's own say in the matter was what determined whether anything could happen. No one could accuse Jensen of being anything less than strong-willed.

It was how she'd won Jared over, after all.

"Honey," Gerald said patiently. "I've seen you two together. Jensen loves you. If she wants to come to Poland with us, she's more than welcome. You let her know, all right?"

Jared mumbled something vaguely assenting.

"You going to be okay by yourself?" Gerald sighed on the other end of the line, and Jared could picture him running his hand through his crisp, dark brown hair. "The situation is critical here, or I wouldn't be pushing the trip back. I'm going to be in the office until late."

"Mmf," Jared mumbled, because she wasn't sure if 'okay' applied to her state of mind, exactly.

"Jared..." Gerald uttered, and there was a question in his voice.

If she asked it, Jared knew her father would come home. He'd put aside everything and bring a pizza with him, and they'd demolish it together while complaining there was nothing on television, and later he would creep up to his study and work until well past midnight.

"I'm okay," Jared said, forcing her voice to be steady. She rubbed at her eye again as her pulse throbbed in her throat with extra violence for a moment while she held her breath.

"That's my girl," Gerald said. "I'll be home later. Order whatever you want if you can't wait, and email me if you want me to bring anything home."

"Marzipan cake?" Jared replied, trying not to quaver. She loved the cake he'd brought home from the Swedish bakery for her birthday, months ago. They had pigged out until she'd been sure she was going to throw up.

"I'll make it happen."

"Dad," Jared spoke up, sensing her father was on the verge of ending the call. She didn't say it often enough, neither of them did. She needed to make sure she still knew how. "I love you."

There was a brief, stomach-lurching second of silence before Gerald's words returned to her. "I love you, too, Jared."

Jared sat beside her open suitcases after the call was ended, phone in her lap as the first tear slid down her face. It was joined by another, and another. She willed her phone to ring but it was silent in her hands.

She could have all she wanted for Christmas, if only she could swallow her pride. There was something that Jensen needed to hear from her, and it was a lot more difficult than an apology.

Jared had always been terrible at overcoming her pride. She didn't know how to reach out and make that first gesture, even now when it mattered most. 

 

After several long moments of sitting immobilized while her fingers crimped together over the silent cell phone, Jared pulled herself together. Her shoulders quivered with soundless quakes as she passed through the room like a wraith, flitting from the unnecessary open suitcase to the bathroom sink. She rubbed at her face and removed her makeup with unsteady swipes of thick astringent-smelling pads.

For the first time in a long time, Jared found herself at a loss for what to do. Unpack? Go to sleep? Follow the sagacity of movie advice and drown her tears in a pint of ice cream while she watched bad rom-coms? She was better than that.

Jared squared her shoulders. She was Gerald Padalecki's daughter, she was Jared Tristan Padalecki. She could do anything. All she needed was a plan and the will to succeed.

She had to bury her face in her hands for a few moments longer, angry with herself for letting Jensen leave, to begin with. Even if she hadn't been able to say those words, she should have been able to say something.

Jared returned to her bed with its peeled-down sheets and the soft but unmistakable scent of their sex, of the arousal they had shared not long ago. She wanted it back. She wanted Jensen in her arms.

She collapsed across the bed, grabbing at the nearest pillow and burying her face in it. When she turned her head, she could detect the hint of coconut and other little scent notes that reminded her of Jensen.

Tchok. Tik, tik, tchok.

Jared's head rose from the pillow, and her hair ruffled up like a crest. She looked around for the source of the noise. It almost sounded like hail across the rooftop, but it had been such a short spate of it that it must have been something else.

Tik. Tik, tik.

Jared's head turned and she looked out the nearest window, surprised to see snow fluttering down in thick, fat flakes across the darkness of the sky. She wiped at her eyes and got up from the bed. Maybe there was a squirrel on the drain pipe.

She went to go look at the snow falling outside of her window, hardly the year's first snowfall but this one would be just in time to blanket the lawns before Christmas.

A patter of stones sprayed against her window as Jared reached for the latches that kept it securely closed. Jared flinched back, confused for a moment before she stepped as close as she could and peered down toward the back patio.

"Jensen?" she whispered.

The tall figure of Jensen in her bright red sweater was unmistakable against a white backdrop of snow, clearly visible in the patio light fixtures that flicked on automatically when someone triggered the motion sensors. Jared stared for a second longer, her brain working to catch up with the unexpected sight. She couldn't quite smile as she hurried to unlatch the window with numb fingers and pushed it wide open, leaning over the sash.

"What are you doing here?" Jared called out, and clapped a hand to her mouth. It was hardly what she'd wanted to say upon first seeing her Jensen after such an ugly parting.

"Being stupidly romantic!" Jensen called back. "Come down here."

Jared shivered across the windowsill. "But it's so cold," she said, her mouth tugging up in a grateful counterpoint to the sheer excess of misery she had dipped into, not so long ago. Jensen was here, and she wanted to be romantic, and Jared knew somehow that even if she didn't speak a word of what she intended, she was forgiven.

"Wear that fur-lined coat of yours!" Jensen called back.

"Hmph," Jared uttered, retracting back into the warm haven of her room and sliding the window shut.

She grabbed her peacoat, because fur was murder, after all, and zoomed through the wide-open, empty hallways of the house until she reached the back patio, the closest point to where she'd seen Jensen standing. It was snowing, and she'd only managed to grab a pair of her new Jeffery Campbell boots to slip over her bare feet, but Jared didn't care as she pushed her way through the French door, leaving it partially ajar in blatant disrespect for power-saving conventions. The door locked automatically and she hadn't grabbed her keys.

Jared hugged her arms, rubbing at them as though they were capable of generating heat from the motion, and stared in wordless awe at the tableau that had been set up outside her house.

At the far corner of the patio, a drum kit had been set up and Sumner was hunched over it, his gaze meeting Jared's briefly as he tapped out a beat. His eyes flicked to the side and Jared glanced that way; Tom stood off to her right, striking up a bass line as he shook his long chestnut hair over one coat-swaddled shoulder. He wore a ski jacket zippered up to the chin and his eyes were downcast.

Bringing her attention center stage, Jared aligned herself with Jensen, her whole face – her very being – suffused with warmth and complete emotion, the overpowering feeling to which she couldn't give voice.

"You planned this," Jared whispered.

Jensen's steady hand moved over the strings of her guitar, pulling together the melody that Sumner and Tom had created. Her emerald eyes soulful on Jared's, she began to sing, rough but enthusiastic.

"I'll have a blue Christmas without you..."

Jared didn't know whether to dissolve into laughter or tears. She burst into a grin, touched beyond measure that Jensen had done this – she'd set this up for Jared, clearly, and when she had told her she was leaving to pick up something for her mother, it was the excuse to slip out here and pull this surprise for Jared, instead.

"Oh," Jared murmured, overcome. She laced her chilled fingertips together and blew on them. Jensen thought she was leaving.

"I'll be so blue just thinking about you..."

Jared held her sincere green eyes with her own hazel ones and could only smile in response, hoping that a fraction of the depth of her emotion was conveyed in return. Jensen thought she was leaving, and despite the things that had been said, and even Jensen questioning Jared's commitment, she had still come back to do this for her.

"Won't be the same, dear, if you're not here with me...I'll have a blue, blue Christmas."

A quavering note hung suspended on the air as their eyes remained locked on one another's. The sensation welled up in Jared's chest until she couldn't contain it anymore. Her eyes were stinging and her face was hot and ice-numb at the same time.

"So," Jensen summed up awkwardly, "I wanted to come back and make sure you knew how much I'm going to miss you." She shifted from one foot to the other, her right hand going up to the base of her neck.

"I love you," Jared uttered.

"What was that?" Jensen uttered with a blink.

"You guys really suck," Jared said, projecting her voice louder. "You need a singer."

"Yeah, Jensen's got a voice suited for yelling, not singing," Tom contributed, grinning when Jensen swung his direction with a 'hey!'

"Is that so," Jensen returned, her eyes heated as she looked Jared's way once more.

"Yeah," Jared said, crunching across the first icy sheen of snow that had formed on the patio flagstones. She hurried across the distance between them on a straight line for Jensen, quickening her steps as she went.

As soon as Jensen realized Jared wasn't stopping, she thrust her guitar in Tom's direction, disentangling the strap and spreading her arms wide. They collided with an oof and Jensen's arms tightened around her as Jared nosed her cold nose against Jensen's colder neck and whispered, "I love you, I love you" against the fine dark blond hairs that twisted up from her neck to join the base. Jensen smelled so good, spicy and sweet all at once, more than a little bit like a boy, but she was the butch to Jared's femme and Jared liked it that way.

"You what?" Jensen teased, clutching Jared to her with one arm as she cupped her free hand to her ear. "I can't quite make that out. What is it you're saying?"

Jared drew herself up and shoved a hand at Jensen's ribs. "I love you," she repeated, loud enough that a deaf person might have a chance of hearing. "And, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things." She looked over Jensen's shoulder at Tom, who was looking up at the falling snow with his lips pursed, pretending not to listen; and Sumner, who had already begun to break down his drum kit into black cases nearby.

"It's all right," Jensen said, and both arms went around Jared, snug and tight. "I love you, too, so I forgive you."

Jared pursed her lips, trying to find something wrong with that. They had fought...Jensen had walked out...wasn't there something she could pin on Jensen, so that she wasn't sole owner of the blame? She dismissed the thought in the next instant, still glowing and magnanimous from the beautiful gesture Jensen had pulled off on her very doorstep.

"Thank you," Jared said. "You might not want to sing again, though. You need someone who's not tone deaf." She kissed Jensen's neck; she had loved her song, because it was Jensen singing it for her, but that was the extent of it.

"Are you offering?" Jensen asked her.

"Maybe," Jared said coyly, burying her face against Jensen's neck again and making her flinch with the sudden shock of icy skin to skin. She wormed her arms around Jensen's waist and hugged her tight, heedless of the cold so long as Jensen was holding her like this, stroking her back and planting tiny kisses near to her ear and jaw.

"But you liked it anyhow?" Jensen prompted, kissing further up her jaw when Jared stirred in her arms. They swayed together as though initiating a slow-dance.

"Mm," Jared agreed. She pulled back to look Jensen in the eye, smiling. She was so warm and comfortable, flush with accomplishment and the nearness of Jensen, love alight in every atom, every point where they connected.

"Because I'm amazing," Jensen concluded smugly.

"Hmph," Jared snorted, but she was smiling, wound so closely around Jensen she could have passed for a second skin, conjoined twin.

Jensen began to kiss her jaw, clearly heading for her mouth, and Jared turned her head, getting a sloppy kiss to her ear with the first hint of tongue as she eyed up Tom, who was still making quite a show of watching the snow drifting from the smudged dark sky overhead. She bit her lip.

"Do you guys want to come inside for some hot cocoa, or something?" Jared offered, making eye contact with Sumner, too, to make it clear that he was invited. She pulled back until she was in the half-circle of her girlfriend's arm.

Jensen made a flapping motion with one hand and Jared peered around her, quirking her mouth and right brow as Jensen lifted that same hand to her now tussled hair, making a show of smoothing it back. She'd been waving the guys off.

"Nah, it's okay," Tom declined. "You two enjoy the evening. We'll bundle all of this stuff into Sumner's van and be on our way. Merry Christmas, ladies." He turned toward a pair of guitar-shaped cases.

"Besides," Sumner added, dry, "Jensen gave us coffee money for our trouble."

"My first paying gig," Tom cracked, clapping Sumner's shoulder in passing.

Jared narrowed her eyes. Both young men had an excellent sense of rhythm and they had played well. If she had her way, it wouldn't be their last paying gig. Jared could do anything once she set her mind to it, after all. And she did know how to sing.

She shivered in the circle of Jensen's arm as warm, wet lips enclosed her nearest earlobe.

"Come on," Jensen spoke directly into her ear. "I want to enjoy the last few uninterrupted hours together that we've got left."

Jared grinned and wriggled on her toes, excited over the surprise she had to share. The cold was starting to permeate her bones, making its way past the thrill of love and accomplishment over sharing with Jensen. They crossed the patio back to the kitchen door, leaving behind two sets of footprints to over-write the lone set that had gotten her there.

In the kitchen, Jared's teeth chattered and Jensen rubbed Jared's hands between her own, grasping at her arms and unzipping her jacket, opening the front of Jared's coat and pressing them together from collarbones to navel.

"You don't need to worry about Danneel," Jensen told her, speaking over the stuttering soundtrack of Jared's teeth clacking together.

Jared shuddered and nuzzled against Jensen's neck. Though Jensen had been out in the cold longer, she seemed to warm up faster. "I know," she spoke up, quiet but firm. She'd already worked that much out for herself.

"I did try to get with her," Jensen said. "Months ago."

"I'm not sure I want to hear this," Jared replied, beginning to wriggle in their close embrace. "So long as it was before me..."

"It was," Jensen assured her, and her arms tightened around Jared. "But there was nothing to confess, okay? I tried to, well, hook up with her, but she started trashing me behind my back and that was it."

Jared blinked. Her stomach loosened from its queasy knot. "That's it?"

"That's it," Jensen repeated. "She only wants me now, because she can see how happy I am with you. With you, not her." She stroked a flyaway piece of Jared's hair back from her face.

"That's messed up," Jared said. She was irked at letting herself be misled by Danneel's outright lie. She thought back to that moment. She'd asked Danneel if she'd slept with Jensen...and the little bimbo bitch hadn't denied it. That was all.

Jared's mouth flattened. She hoped Danneel wasn't too attached to whatever outfit she wore to the next party they mutually attended.

"I don't want to talk about her," Jensen replied simply. "She's dogged me long enough. I just want to be with you, and enjoy it until tomorrow, okay?"

Jared's face lit up as she recalled her plan, the phone call, and her father's invitation. So much roller coaster despair and joy in one evening, she could barely ride it out. "Come upstairs," she invited. "I have your Christmas present."

"But, I don't want--" Jensen started.

Jared laid her fingers over Jensen's plush lips. "Trust me," Jared said, and bit her lip over a shy smile. "This is what you've been wanting."

She led Jensen upstairs, sliding her peacoat off her shoulders and casting it to the side as they reached the doorway of her room.

Everything was as she had left it, bed half unmade where they had pushed the covers down, suitcases open at the foot of the canopied bed, cell phone left in the middle of the room. The bathroom light was still on.

"What do you want most for Christmas, Jensen?" Jared inquired, turning around and trying not to smile too widely. This would backfire on her if she wasn't right in having finally guessed it.

Jensen shook her head, fixing her gaze on the floor. "You know I don't want you to get me anything--" she started.

"Tell me," Jared insisted. "I'm not talking about gifts, now. I want to know, I want to hear it. What do you want for Christmas?"

Jensen's eyes lifted and she met Jared's gaze with ferocious intensity. "You, okay?" she demanded roughly, striding across the distance and seizing Jared's shoulders in her hands. "All I want is you. And I can't, so Christmas is going to suck without you, and—"

Jared prised out of Jensen's grip enough to surge forward and join their mouths, interrupting Jensen's tirade with a mushy but enthusiastic kiss across her parted lips.

"You can," Jared whispered, when she pulled back enough to look into Jensen's half-closed green eyes. "You can have me."

Jensen's fingers flexed on her shoulders. "What are you saying? That...that you're with me, even if you're all the way over in Poland?"

Jared shook her head, her mouth tugging upward of its own will. "I'm saying, Dad pushed back our flight dates, and--"

An ardent whoop from Jensen cut her off before she could go any further, and Jensen picked her right up off the floor, hugging Jared around the waist and crushing their bodies together. Jensen had a good grip on her and swung her around in a full circle before putting her down, cradling her close and spreading kisses from her ear down toward her mouth.

"Jared, my Jay," Jensen chanted. "Mine, all mine, I'll have you for Christmas, and I'll have you again..."

"All yours," Jared promised, threading her hands beneath Jensen's dreadlocks to hold tightly to her nape. She grinned as Jensen dotted an enthusiastic kiss on her nose. "And Dad said you can come to Berlin with us after Christmas, if you're willing?"

"Are you kidding?" Jensen exclaimed, and spun Jared around in another dizzy circle, tighter than the first. Laughing, they stumbled toward the bed, connecting their lips again and again in hazy, excited kisses, each blurring into the next, and the next.

"My father's not much of a kidder," Jared replied, wry.

Jensen kissed the bridge of her nose, working down the slope and placing a longer kiss on her upper lip before poking her tongue into Jared's mouth.

Jared squeaked but opened readily enough to Jensen's kiss. She wound her hands in the soft piled mass of Jensen's ruffled hair, stroking, cupping the delicate bones at the base of Jensen's skull.

"I would not miss the chance to meet your Polish peeps for the world," Jensen informed her, kissing the divot below Jared's nose and looking down at her, eyes warm, before bending to kiss more of Jared's face, from the mole beneath her chin to the one on her temple.

"My peeps?" Jared protested, but she was feeble beneath Jensen's advances, as a hand massaged her waist and they tipped onto the bed together. Another hand was going for her track pants and Jared squeaked louder, remembering a reason to resist. "Wait, no!"

Jensen froze atop her, nose at Jared's jawline and one hand up Jared's shirt, her fingers tracing out the lower curve of one slight breast.

"No?" she returned, managing to sound pathetic and indignant all at once.

"No," Jared said firmly, sitting up and pushing Jensen off her lap. A butterfly swirl of nervousness funneled up her middle, fanning her face with heat in passing. "I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back, okay?"

Jensen pouted, tugging up her giant red sweater to reveal a toned slice of midsection. "All right, but if you take too long, I'm getting started without you."

Jared raised both brows, giving Jensen her best approximation of a devilish smirk. "I think I'm worth waiting for...don't you?"

"Dammit it, Jared!" Jensen cried out, pounding the mattress with a thwarted fist as Jared slipped out of range. "When you put it that way, what am I supposed to do?"

"Keep it in your pants," Jared advised mischievously. She hurried to the bathroom, making a brief stop at her dresser along the way. She had something worth waiting for, she hoped, but considering she was just as eager for it, she certainly didn't want to keep Jensen waiting for long.

There were presents to be unwrapped, after all; and this one wouldn't wait for Christmas morning.


	7. The Gift That Keeps On Giving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared gives Jensen her Christmas wish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of sex!

Jared stood before the bathroom mirror for a moment longer, sucking air between her teeth as she appraised the long, curvaceous figure she saw before slipping her loose leopard-print gray shirt over her head. She was wearing a new bra, lacey black, no padding because well she had enough of that with her full 38 C-cup size. Unlike her usual, the sleeping shirt was large and loose enough to slip off one shoulder, which it generally did. Most importantly, it was baggy enough to disguise the lines of her body and hide her little surprise. She had taken just enough time to wash up and get ready for the best part of the evening to come.

"Jay!" Jensen called out from her bedroom. "I need you!" She did, indeed, sound very needy.

With a smile tugging at her mouth, Jared opened the door and lounged against the side for a moment, striking a pose with her hip cocked out and one arm stretched above her head. Her other hand fanned over her hip and Jared considered the possibility of getting a tattoo there. "You need me?" she prompted.

"It was on my fortune cookie. I need you," Jensen said, pushing up on her elbows to connect their gazes darkly. She added with a trace of a smirk, "In bed."

Jared's lips curved in a fond, faintly teasing smile. "You're in my bed," she pointed out, coming to a stop at the carved foot board.

"Whatever; a bed was involved," Jensen replied with a flick of her fingers. She pushed her hips up, shifting on the bed and licking her lips. "Fuck, you look so good. I wanna finger you."

"I want more than that," Jared told her, stooping briefly to fetch the package that had been hidden under her dust ruffle since its discreet arrival from vibrators.com.

"Oral, then," Jensen promised, the hint of a moan in her voice. "I want to taste you, suck your little clit, make you come and lick it up, wanna..."

"More," Jared said hoarsely, stepping around the side of the bed with the gaily wrapped box in her hands.

"Baby, what more--" Tom began, and stopped herself, leaning on one elbow as Jared reached her side.

"I got you something," Jared said, ducking her head and giving Jensen a sidelong glance as though shy about it.

She wasn't shy in the least; not anymore. She was throbbing with anxiety and desire to have Jensen's beautifully-shaped fingers on her, the two of them rubbing every inch of skin across one another as they strove for their pleasure.

"But, I told you not to--" Jensen started, and cut off as Jared climbed onto the bed beside her.

"Trust me," Jared said, nuzzling close to Jensen's ear and burrowing into the circle of her arm. "You want to unwrap this."

"Rather unwrap you," Jensen muttered, hooking her close and pressing a kiss to the corner of her mouth.

"We'll get to that," Jared replied with a short chuckle. She patted Jensen's thigh, butting their heads close together as though she were a headstrong kitten. "This first."

"All I wanted was you," Jensen grumbled reproachfully as she began to tear at the bright red and gold wrapping paper. "You didn't have to--" She fell silent as she pulled the box free of its enshrouding paper.

"If you don't like it, we can get a different one..." Jared began, stroking over Jensen's arm and leaning to peer anxiously at her face.

Jensen's expression was unreadable, her tongue dwelling against her lip ring as she regarded the box in her lap. There was a clear window through which the red silicon dildoes were visible, as well as part of the black harness that would keep one strapped around Jensen's slender hips.

"I wasn't sure, I mean, you only mentioned--" Jared continued.

She was interrupted as a kiss was mashed to her lips.

"Are you sure?" Jensen asked, speaking directly against her parted lips. "Those are definitely boy-shaped..."

"But you're not a boy," Jared concluded. "We're doing this together, and it's not like..." Jared squirmed, pushing her face against Jensen's shoulder.

"It's not like you want me to be a boy, because we're using dildoes," Jensen concluded.

"Mm-hmm," Jared murmured.

Jensen grinned and kissed her again. "My point exactly," she said. She patted Jared's thigh and got up from the bed, taking the box with her.

Jared whined in her throat, ready to unleash a pout.

"I'm going to go wash these, okay?" Jensen told her. "Then we can use this, together." She leaned over Jared with a hand stroking her arm, pressing light butterfly kisses over her upturned face before drawing away.

"Yes, please," Jared murmured, tipping back on the bed as her girlfriend retreated. She opened and closed her thighs as heat began to spread from her middle. She wanted Jensen to unwrap her other present, now, and she wanted it immediately.

"Did they send some antibiotic toy cleaner with it?" Jensen called, already headed for the bathroom with her prize.

"Yes, it's on the bathroom counter," Jared called back, skimming restless hands up her shirt and passing them over her stomach, stroking her thumbs over her lowest ribs. She wanted Jensen on her now, in her arms, their bellies pressed together...not to mention, she was getting increasingly eager over the prospect of using the toy she'd gotten, the two of them connecting in one of the most intimate ways possible.

"Found it!" Jensen exclaimed, and the sound of running water followed.

Jared continued to stroke her hands up and down her front, from ribs to hips, avoiding her more sensitive regions. Their positions were reverted now; she was the one on the bed, one giant exposed nerve of neediness, waiting for Jensen to return to her so they could press together and make each other feel good. She wanted to draw up all of the most pleasurable sensations from Jensen that would give her pleasure, too, and show her exactly how cherished Jensen made her feel.

She pushed her shirt up a bit in her urgency but continued to stay away from actual erogenous zones. Jared teased her fingers over the skin of her belly between her navel and her panty-line. She wanted more, but she wanted Jensen to go there.

When Jensen appeared in the doorway, Jared was breathless with anticipation.

"I need you," Jared informed her, knowing exactly where Jensen had been coming from moments before. Her entire body craved a dose of Jensen, the two of them pressed skin to skin, breasts to breasts and more. Her imagination was blasting ahead, guns blazing along the track as she considered Jensen on her, something between them in her, and the two of them moving together in beautiful synchronicity.

"I'm going to make you feel so good," Jensen responded, crossing the distance between them with the toy in one arm and a towel slung over the other.

Jared could only smile up at her, bemused and basking in love, in all the little ways Jensen took care of her. She held out an arm as Jensen climbed onto the bed beside her.

"Love you," Jared gave breathless voice to it again.

Jensen's whole face lit up and she draped herself atop Jared, setting the toy to one side on top of the towel. One hand caressed Jared's face and she closed the gap, her beautiful green eyes fixed on Jared until their lips touched, and their eyes slid shut at last.

Jared looped her arms around Jensen's neck, caressing her back over the red sweater she'd donned, reveling in the feel of the soft wool. Jensen was propped over her on one arm but her other hand was making a fast track up Jared's shirt, smoothing over her hip and her abdomen and feathering over her ribs, making Jared squirm.

"Touch me," Jared murmured against the corner of Jensen's mouth, before dotting a kiss there.

"Am touching you," Jensen countered with a hint of a chuckle in her mischievous husky voice before she brought her hand up higher, cupping the extensiveness of Jared's breast.

"Ohh," Jared sighed in pleasure, "like that." She hooked a leg over Jensen's thigh and pushed her hips up, rubbing softly. Heat was gathering between her legs, and she knew her panties were getting damp already. She was always wet for Jensen; it was a source of occasional embarrassment to Jared and pride for Jensen.

"I'm going to get you nice and wet," Jensen said into her ear as though reading her mind.

"Mmm," Jared hummed helpfully, pressing herself up against Jensen's groin.

Jensen kissed her leisurely, thoroughly, with such attention and slow swipes of tongue that she made it clear they weren't going anywhere for hours, as well as the fact that she was in control of the kiss. Every time Jared whimpered and tried to kiss back harder, pushing lips and urgent tongue against her, Jensen would settle more heavily atop her and begin to nuzzle and tongue along Jared's jaw and neck until Jared subsided beneath her again.

At last Jared was a writhing mess beneath her and kept trying to grind her hips up against Jensen with low "uh, uhmm" noises as Jensen kept chaining maddening kisses from her mouth to her ear, the sensitive spot behind it, and down to her neck.

"If you don't fuck me I'm going to have an orgasm just from the two of us rubbing off," Jared warned. She pushed her hands at Jensen's unyielding shoulders.

Jensen smirked over at her, sitting up on Jared's groin and peeling her red sweater off, tossing it to the side of the bed. "Really," Jensen replied with an interested eyebrow quirk. She was bare-breasted beneath, and Jared reached for them.

"Nnnh," Jared groaned, grinding her teeth as Jensen leaned down to palm both her breasts, leaning against her but not putting her weight on Jared's chest. "Yeah, and I...I want..."

"I want your shirt off," Jensen told her, tugging at the hem.

"Oh, uh-huh," Jared responded vaguely. She wriggled out of it, casting it after Jensen's, and lay there panting as Jensen looked down at her with hungry dark eyes, like Jared was the buffet and Jensen hadn't eaten all week. For an instant Jared thought Jensen was going to bend down and lavish her kisses further down, paying attention to her heavy breasts with their tight nipples, but instead Jensen scooted back to kneel between Jared's legs.

"Now I want you naked," Jensen said.

"Oh, nnnh...and it's all about what you want," Jared responded, but her hips rose as Jensen began to peel her black tiny sleep shorts down her thighs.

"Wow," Jensen uttered, and Jared lifted her head up to catch the look on her face. She was staring down at Jared's groin with a rapt look on her face. "All gift-wrapped for me, huh?"

"The rest of your gift," Jared muttered, torn between feeling stupid about it and grinning like a derp.

"It's everything I wanted," Jensen said softly, laying a hand on Jared's sternum. "Just you."

Jared turned her head to the side, biting her lip.

"Hey," Jensen said, stroking her thigh. "I mean it. All I want is you. We don't have to use the toy tonight--"

"But I want to," Jared blurted, and battled the instant fiery heat of a flush as Jensen chuckled, slipping her fingers beneath the red and gold ribbon that Jared had tied around her hips.

"What a pretty bow," Jensen said. "It's kind of a shame to unwrap it."

Jared arched her brow in response. "You want in these panties, it has to go."

Jensen ripped the bow off so quickly it cut into Jared's hips and she squeaked in surprise and discomfort. Jensen parted her thighs wider with one hand, trailing a finger along the hem of her green-stitched red panties.

"See," Jensen said in a conspiratorial tone. "You got into the Christmas spirit, just fine."

Jared groaned and flexed her buttocks, pushing her panty-shielded groin up against Jensen's hand. "I'd like something else in me, now."

"Patience," Jensen chided, but her eyes flashed and her tongue ran along the full line of her lip, working against the corner lip ring in a slow, lascivious reminder of her oral proclivities. She patted Jared's thigh before skimming her panties down.

With a sigh, Jared laid back against the pillows and cooperated as Jensen liberated her of the last shred of her clothing. She watched, the flutters of arousal in her stomach multiplying as Jensen skimmed her lips up the inside of one leg and licked her way up Jared's inner thigh, hovering above her cunt so close that her breath stirred against the hairless flesh.

"I don't think you have much of a hymen, but this will still probably be a bit uncomfortable at first," Jensen told her, stroking a thumb alongside Jared's labia, making her whimper and tighten with the intensity of her need. "So I want to make you as wet as possible before we..." She trailed off, tilting her head and raising a brow before she lowered her face to Jared's little hairless lips.

"Nnnnh...Jen," Jared sighed luxuriously as Jensen pried her open with lips and the devoted movements of her tongue, licking right down into her and delving for Jared's clit at once. She certainly wasn't going to object to Jensen going down on her for any length of time, no matter what came after.

Jensen pressed her face right in, holding Jared's thighs down with both hands so that Jared couldn't close her legs around Jensen's head.

Jared sobbed and sighed; pressed her hands to the masses of Jensen's hair and rolled her hips to test Jensen's implacable grip. She kept asking for more, more, and the sparks of pleasure multiplied in her belly until she couldn't stand it anymore. She was about to buck up against an ecstatic constellation of sensation in response to Jensen's devoted lips and tongue when Jensen pulled back, her face flushed and her lips almost crimson.

"Oh, oh," Jared sobbed breathlessly, her orgasm denied.

"Ready?" Jensen asked her, nuzzling against her thigh.

"Come up here and kiss me," Jared ordered, holding her arms out.

Jensen's face did that instant brightening as she did whenever receiving an order from Jared that she really, really wanted to follow through on, or whenever she turned to find Jared's attention on her. She turned to one side and shed her pants and boxers before crawling up the length of Jared's body, kissing her naked bits as though mapping pleasure trails, and settled atop her.

"We could do this some more in a bit," Jensen suggested, pushing against Jared and rocking their groins together. The trimmed hair that lined Jensen's cunt tickled against Jared's mostly-bare bits and they both sighed before Jensen laid her lips against Jared's.

They rocked together some more and Jared was awash in pleasure, Jensen's long fingers stroking her breasts. She tried to remember why there was anything necessary beyond the beautiful sensations they were giving to each other now.

Jensen nipped at Jared's lower lip, kissing her chin and rocking harder atop her. "We can kiss all you want, when I'm pushing that toy back and forth between us."

"Ohh," Jared moaned, grasping at Jensen's shoulders. "What are you waiting for? Stop teasing me and let's do it." She was intensely curious to see how it would be different – not better, she was sure – but how it would change their lovemaking.

Her face burned as Jensen sat on top of her and Jared let herself consider the details again; Jensen with that toy jutting out from her groin, nestling it down into Jared's cunt and joining the two of them in one of the most intimate ways possible.

"Are you wet enough?" Jared asked Jensen, recalling her words from shortly before she'd short-circuited Jared's brain with an excess of pleasure.

"Baby, I've been wet enough since you came out of the bathroom with your top slipped off one shoulder, cocking your hip out like that," Jensen murmured, leaning forward once more to brush her lips over Jared's.

Jared pursed her lips, but Jensen was already pulling away, reaching for the harness and the double-ended dildo fastened to the middle of it. She knelt up over Jared as she began to fiddle with straps and placement, and Jared watched with her lip caught between her teeth, half fascinated, the rest of her apprehensive. She folded her hands over her sternum as she gazed up at Jensen and the red dildo that bobbed gently between her thighs as she began to finesse everything into place.

"Oh," the soft sound escaped Jared's lips and she reached to stroke Jensen's thighs as Jensen pushed the red dildo into herself with a quiet, almost unheard grunt. There was no need to ask if Jensen had done this before. Jared tried not to pinch up in a frown as she considered faceless others that might have showed Jensen this pleasure. They were here together, now, and Jensen was doing this with her because she loved her, not merely to get off.

Jensen's eyes glittered down at her as her hand moved steadily down below, pushing the dildo deeper into herself as she hovered over Jared.

Jared stretched up, caught between staring at the sight of Jensen sinking the dildo into herself and gazing up into the intensity of Jensen's pleasure-stricken face. She stroked Jensen's legs, her arms, and reached up to cup her full breasts as Jensen moved atop her in small motions, adjusting the fit of the dildo before reaching for the straps of the harness that would keep it secured to her body.

Of the two of them, Jensen tended to be quieter in bed – and teased Jared about her loudness – so Jared had to go off the non-verbal cues that told of Jensen's arousal. Jensen was breathing faster, and her skin was scorching to Jared's fingertips as she caressed everywhere she could reach. Her eyes were huge and dark and her expression was faintly pained.

"Okay?" Jared murmured.

"God," Jensen gasped at last, as she finished securing the harness around her hips. "Want to get on you, so bad."

Jared reached for Jensen's neck, but her girlfriend was still sitting on top of her, effectively fixing her in place. "Please, please, I want that," she breathed, attempting to push up to show Jensen just how much. "Let's have sex, please, push it in me, I want to feel your lips against mine..."

She didn't mean their mouths, and Jensen's hooded eyes flared as though she knew exactly what Jared meant.

Still Jensen hesitated. "It's going to hurt a little," she murmured, moving forward to cup Jared's breasts. "You got us a pretty big one, it's the largest you've had."

Jared couldn't escape the heat of the blush fanning up into her face and spreading over her fair collarbones. "Well, then it suits your ego," she shot back, wriggling under Jensen and reaching up her arms to invite Jensen into them.

Jensen merely smiled down at her in response to that, her expression one of delight.

"I don't care if it hurts...at first," Jared said at last, begrudging the answer at all, but it appeared as though Jensen wasn't going to move without it. "I know you're going to make it good."

With a slow nod, Jensen covered her, moving into Jared's arms. Something nudged Jared between the legs and she parted her thighs wider to accept Jensen between them, catching her breath.

Jensen hovered over her like that a moment longer, one hand cupping Jared's breast, nudging their faces together as she sought her mouth. Her bangs slid forward to veil their faces.

"I want it, I want you," Jared breathed against Jensen's mouth as Jensen drew back to lick her lips. She surged up and caught at Jensen's lip ring, nibbling there.

"Okay," Jensen said, but hovered and shared Jared's airspace for a moment longer, exhaling ragged breath against her lips and chin.

Jared stroked over her waist. "You'll make it good," she soothed.

Jensen grimaced. "That's a lot of pressure," she muttered.

Jared gave her a serene smile. "You can't help it. You're my Jen." She squeezed her legs around Jensen's to give her encouragement.

"Okay..." Jensen said with a nod, but rested her head briefly against Jared's shoulder for a second before kissing it. She drew back to look Jared in the eye. "Tell me if it hurts."

It won't, Jared thought, and the mutinous thought that she wouldn't tell Jensen flitted through her mind right after. It would pass, and Jensen might over-react...

"I mean it," Jensen said a bit more sharply, intuiting Jared's thoughts from her expression. "It shouldn't hurt too much."

Jared raised a brow. "Define 'too much,'" she countered.

"More than cramps during your period," Jensen replied.

Jared made a face. "That's so sexy," she mumbled, reaching up to grab Jensen's breast and rekindle the mood. Something unyielding was nudging at the crease between her legs and she knew what it was, and the heady mix of arousal and nerves reignited in the pit of her stomach. "Come on, make me feel good."

Jensen hummed deep in her throat and braced herself over Jared with one hand, reaching down between them.

Jared's eyes fluttered as Jensen's hand brushed over her groin, her thumb making a brief detour to rub at her clit. She squeezed her thighs around Jensen's trim hips and stared up into Jensen's dark, needy eyes as Jensen parted Jared's folds with her fingers before guiding the head of the toy to her entrance.

"Oh," the sound rose up from Jared's throat, starved and hoarse.

Jensen smiled down at her, tracing one side of Jared's entrance with her thumb before she eased some of her weight down onto her.

Jared bit her lip, brow knitting unconsciously as she took stock of the sensations. Jensen was propped above her, and the toy was entering her slowly. It was stretching her wider than anything she'd taken into her body, bigger than fingers or the slim vibrators Jensen had used on her so far. There was a slight burn but the warmth in her belly overrode any pain. She stroked Jensen's breasts and murmured a request for more. Much as Jensen's eyes searched her face anxiously, Jared was hungrily consuming every detail of Jensen's face, and behind the anxiety was heavy-lidded lust waiting to flare up and catch them both aflame. Jensen was hot, so hot for her, and Jared panted and eased her thighs wider and strained upward for the taste of Jensen's mouth against hers.

"Okay?" Jensen mumbled, before squeaking as the toy slid inside Jared unexpectedly and went in almost all the way.

A similar noise was surprised from Jared and she grabbed at Jensen's shoulders, startled and unsure whether she was turned on or in pain or some mix of both. She was throbbing, that much was for sure. She began to unwind from her tense clench as Jensen scattered kisses over her face, dwelling last on her lips. The hand that had been between them drifted up the length of Jared's body and stroked again and again over the tender silky flesh of the underside of Jared's left breast.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," Jared assured her, but although she was sure of that, she wasn't sure whether she quite wanted to move yet. At that moment, she felt it – Jensen's sex pressed against her own, and the dildo was so deep inside her she ached. "Oh God, you're in me."

"Not technically," Jensen corrected, stroking up Jared's side and teasing her nipple to a fine point.

"Feels like you're in me," Jared murmured, pushing her hips up. The jolt of pleasure that went through her was astounding and she made a little noise, repeating the motion. Above her Jensen's mouth had fallen open and she looked pained again, but her own matching noise was anything but.

Hands stroked at her face and hair and Jared gaped in wonder at Jensen as the two of them began to move, slow at first. She turned her face up for a kiss, catching at the glint of Jensen's lip-ring when Jensen didn't respond quick enough to suit her. At that point their mouths crashed together and Jensen groaned directly into Jared, rolling her hips in slow but decisive movements that sent jabs of pleasure coursing through Jared.

"Unh, unnh!" Jared gave voice to the cresting sensation inside her, locking her hands behind Jensen's neck. She was fully into it now, and not content with merely receiving Jensen's tentative thrusts. The dildo felt good inside her, but the way Jensen surged over her, making sweet little sex noises of which she probably wasn't even aware, was even better.

They kissed and rubbed their bodies together as Jensen worked her hips in taut circles. Jared gave her anxious yips in response, tightening her legs where she had them locked over Jensen's thighs every time it caused her to slow and peer worriedly into Jared's face.

"It's good, it's so good," Jared assured her, exhilarated and drained by turns. This was more energetic than even the wildest frottage they'd engaged in. At the same time, though, she didn't ever want Jensen to stop making her feel so good.

It seemed as though Jensen was everywhere atop her – kneading her breasts, skilled fingers toying with her nipples; mouth catching at Jared's and skimming along the line of her neck; bellies pressed together and their wet cunts colliding with emphatic smacks as Jensen fucked her. Spasms caused Jared to shudder with brief shockwaves of pleasure as she tightened down around the dildo Jensen was pushing into her – the same one embedded deep within Jensen, making her feel the same way. It wasn't even vibrating, and yet Jared was getting so much out of what they were doing that she was ready to come on the spot. A single touch, one lick, another jolt of Jensen's hips as she pushed into her would do it.

"I'm coming, you're making me come," Jared warned. She clutched at Jensen's shoulders and panted, once again surprised at how fast Jensen was bringing her to orgasm. She had no defenses against the surging pleasure Jensen brought to bear.

Jensen merely nodded, sending her bangs into her eyes coursing everywhere as she continued to rock atop Jared, moving so fast their bodies were constantly connected. She reached down to grip Jared's leg, pushing one up and outward a bit more as she rolled deep inside of her. That accomplished, she began to thumb Jared's clit with single-minded insistence.

Jared wailed, tensing and clutching at Jensen with everything she had as she reached her climax. She wrapped her legs over Jensen's waist and butt and clamped down in the throes of it. "Jen,Jensen!” she cried out, hoarse, before her voice gave out and she cried out in a wordless burst of pleasure.

She relaxed in the next instant, though still clinging to Jensen as her lover panted in her ear and continued to thrust.

"Oh...oh, please," Jared cried, her back arching as she pushed her belly up against Jensen's.

"Too much?" Jensen panted in her ear. She kept moving, though, pushing into Jared with quick shallow hip-rolls that caused a pleasurable after-burn, almost painful but Jensen's face was so rapturous that all Jared could do was grin stupidly up at her and caress each part of Jensen that she could reach.

"I love you," Jared said fondly, hugging her thighs tight around Jensen and petting her hair.

Jensen's eyes went wide and she lurched over Jared, kissing her clumsily and wedging her hand between them again. She jerked atop Jared and sighed luxuriously.

Jared grinned, certain she'd felt it – the wetness of Jensen's come against her groin. She wrapped her arms around Jensen's shoulders and hugged her tight, squeaking as the dildo between them made itself known again as their groins kissed.

"Oh, that was..." Jensen sighed in her ear, before pulling off to the side.

"Mmm," Jared agreed, keeping an arm around her. She stroked over Jensen's bare waist as Jensen pulled out, both of them cringing reflexively. "You liked it?"

"It's the gift that keeps on giving," Jensen purred, kissing her face, nuzzling into Jared's neck and making her squeak at the ticklish sensation. "That was my question, for you."

"I loved it," Jared said honestly, shifting to accommodate as Jensen undid the harness and lifted up, reaching beyond their overlapping bodies to set the toy and harness aside on the nearby towel.

"Like you love Jensen?" Jensen pursued with an adorable little grin, before pushing her face into Jared's sweaty neck.

"Don't push it," Jared mumbled, but she was already hugging Jensen tight against her body again. "Of course what I feel for you is more."

Jensen laughed and nudged against her, rolling them across Jared's bed until Jared was laying atop her, their breasts pressed flat together. "Merry Christmas, baby."

"Because of you," Jared replied, and followed it up with a kiss. "This one's the merriest."


	8. Christmas Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost over! One more chapter

The snow was falling, soft and thick, around the eaves of the gigantic house. Jared stood beside the French lace curtains in the bay window of the front half of the kitchen, arms wrapped tightly across her front. It was Christmas Eve, and the house was empty. There would be no celebrations here.

"You ready to go?" a low voice murmured in her ear, and arms wrapped around her waist from behind.

Jared smiled, snuggling back into Jensen's embrace. She had never hosted a Christmas eve, and she wouldn't be starting a new tradition this year. The house was empty but for her and Jensen, and they were getting ready to go over to the Ackles house for the festivities.

"Your mom knows I'm spending the night, right?" Jared asked anxiously, twisting in Jensen's arms and sneaking a hand between them. Intending to place her fingers around Jensen's nape, she got distracted in passing and made a detour for the round firmness of a breast.

Jensen caught her breath and grinned at her. "No way is Mom letting us drive when she knows we'll have been at the champagne spritzers all night," she replied, kissing the tip of Jared's nose.

Jared wrinkled it. "Okay, but we're not having sex in your parents' house for everyone to hear..."

"You can be quiet if your head's buried between my legs, right?" Jensen inquired hopefully.

Jared gave her an exasperated look and pinched her breast. When Jensen yipped, she made her escape. "I don't even have any presents for your family," she fretted, hurrying over to the wrapped dishes she'd thrown together. At the very least, she could bring over some delicious casserole and tasty side dishes courtesy of Whole Foods.

"That's not what it's about, at all," Jensen said, moving toward the window through which Jared had been watching the snow drift down. "Ooh, it's snowing!"

"I'm glad we're taking your car," Jared proclaimed, staring mistrustfully out the window over the sink. There was already plenty of snow on the ground, and the heavens were seeing fit to grace them with several inches more. Jared hadn't spent her time driving roads like this since she had gotten her driver license not long ago. "You've got four wheel drive and you're sitting nice and high."

"Especially with my gal beside me," Jensen said amiably, hooking her thumbs in her low-riding pockets and swaggering toward the kitchen island.

Jared smirked over at her. She headed for a cupboard to get a bag in which to stack her things, contemplating Jensen's body swathed in over-sized clothes as usual. Even through her loose shirt she had an unmistakably svelte figure, and Jared loved each curve. She cocked her head. In her unisex clothes, Jensen was occasionally mistaken for a boy, especially with her brash demeanor. Jared found herself wondering if she'd still be with Jensen, be as attracted to her, if she were a boy. Jared swung both ways, after all.

She eyed Jensen up as she returned to the kitchen counter and began to stack her containers into the sturdy canvas bag. If Jensen were a Tom, in truth, Jared decided she might have held out for longer. The kind of breezy confidence from her girl Jensen was a good deal more attractive than similarly forthright behavior from a boy. In fact, if her Tom were a boy Jared would probably think he was a bit of a pig, especially if he'd had the player reputation.

"What's that look on your face?" Jensen wanted to know, sidling over to her and putting an arm around her waist. She leaned in to kiss Jared's neck and Jared moved, landing it on her shoulder instead. "Thinking about kitchen sex?"

"Hmm," Jared said, scrunching up her face. "Thinking about double standards." She tipped her head to the side. She would have ended up with Jensen no matter what, she decided. They were meant to be.

"Look, I don't mean to," Jensen said, putting on an earnest expression. "You're just better than everyone else, Jay."

Jared grinned at her and stuck her tongue out.

"You ready to go?" Jensen asked, reaching around her to pluck the canvas bag from the counter. She hefted it easily, compared to how Jared might have fumbled it with her stick-thin arms.

"Yeah, I just..." Jared said, making a gesture toward the liquor cabinet. She was debating the advisability of taking something from Gerald's private stash as a host gift for the Ackles family. Donna and her husband would appreciate it, at least, and perhaps be inclined to overlook the underage drinking going on beneath their noses.

Jared's phone shrilled out its rotary-tone jangle, making them both startle. It was jouncing its way across the counter and she hurried toward it, scooping it up and reminding herself to update her contacts so she'd know who was calling.

"Santa's Post-Holiday Elvish Rehab Center; we're still closed for the season," Jared said into the phone, saucy. She began to giggle even before she heard a response from the other end.

"Cute," Gerald's voice remarked on the other end of the line. "I'm calling for my daughter, she's too young to be in rehab. Neither is she elvish."

"I dunno, Dad, have you seen my ears?" Jared shot back, cuddling into the arm that Jensen roped around her. "They've been awfully pointy since birth or so."

"Your mother was hardly one of the Fair Folk," Gerald said, and switched gears. "I'm going to be here rather late tonight. After I finish pushing paperwork I'm expected to put in an appearance at the company party."

"Dateless?" Jared said, shaking her head sadly.

"Alas, no," Gerald intoned. "I've been set up."

"It's a trap," Jared advised. "If your company has any kind of office pool, they expect you to marry the poor girl. So you're stuck downtown?"

"For the next several hours," Gerald replied.

But it's Christmas, Jared would have whined in days past, only to receive the firm response, "it's the day before, which is still a work-day here." Instead, she leaned into Jensen's arm and smiled when that arm tightened around her. "Stop by Jensen's house when you're done," she said. "I hear they're making a Christmas tofurkey."

"Sounds...vegetarian," Gerald hedged.

"The tofurkey is tomorrow," Jensen said, not bothering to lower her voice. "It's appetizers and snack food galore, tonight. And you're welcome any time before midnight, Mr. P. After that point if you show up, my little brother will think you're Santa."

Gerald snorted in Jared's ear and they shared a quiet laugh.

"If you don't have anything planned for tomorrow," Jensen continued, "you're definitely welcome at our place for dinner. There's always too much food and we welcome the company."

"Thank you, I'll see how it goes," Gerald told Jared. "And Jared?"

"Hmm?" Jared replied, her head tucked comfortably against Jensen's shoulder.

"I'm very glad you've found someone who makes you so happy," Gerald said to her. "I've failed you on that score for awhile now, haven't I?"

"Dad," Jared uttered, pained. She didn't know how she could be expected to answer such a question.

"You don't need to say anything," Gerald told her. "Have a good time with Jensen and her family tonight. I'll call you later."

The dial tone resounded in her ear and Jensen hugged her, chinning her shoulder.

"Everything okay?" Jensen asked her, as Jared pocketed her phone at last.

"Yeah," Jared said. She gave Jensen one of her most brilliant smiles. "Yeah, I think so."

Hand in hand they left the Padalecki house. The snowflakes were falling thick and fast outside, and it was already dark out. Jensen hummed softly under her breath as she steered the car through streets with the swathes of light that the Trucks headlights cut across the snow-pale masses in front of them. There was something on the radio, Christmas music to a hip hop beat, and instead of making faces Jared bopped her head in time to the music.

"Are you all packed for Poland?" Jared wanted to know, drawing one knee up as the big black car surged effortlessly through the snowy streets.

"Yeah, you know me," Jensen replied. "I threw a few color-coordinated shirts and caps into a suitcase and I'm good to go."

Jared grinned. "Yeah, the coordination is the only way I know you're a girl," she joked.

"Really," Jensen uttered, turning her attention from the road briefly to favor Jared with a raised brow.

Jared flushed. She wasn't going to say anything about strap-ons and penis envy; she was not. Besides, she'd enjoyed each successive use of the toy since that first amazing orgasm together. Jensen dominating the top.

"Well," Jared said. "That and the whole vagina thing. I'm very fond of it; you must have noticed."

"I'm attached to it, myself!" Jensen replied cheerfully.

Jared snickered; they both cracked up, and Jensen reached over to turn the music up as a recognizable holiday jingle came on the radio. Jared lapsed back into her seat and this time she was the one to sing along.

"We'll have to get you singing Christmas carols with the family," Jensen commented.

"Hmm," Jared said, and an idea flourished. She had never been much of a fan of Christmas carols because the 'most wonderful time of the year' had typically meant a season of loneliness and broken promises. She had something to bargain, now. "I'll trade you Christmas carols for a demo tape."

"Huh, what?" Jensen glanced over at her from the driver seat before focusing on the road again. "That doesn't exactly sound like a fair exchange."

"I know; think what I'll be doing for our career," Jared replied smugly. She was certain all it would take would be a demo tape and some exposure – and her father could manage the second one.

"We'll talk about this later," Jensen said at last, and she sounded serious about it.

That suited Jared perfectly. Jensen was so carefree in so many respects, but Jared needed her to be serious about the music if they were going to make a career of it. After seeing the three of them play the other night, it was as though something had clicked into place for Jared. Sumner was solid and steady on the drums, playful Tom turned out a strong reliable bass line, and Jensen's talented fingers worked that guitar almost as beautifully as she played one other thing with such devotion. Jared knew she had the powerful vocals to front them.

When they arrived at the Ackles house, Jensen pulled the Truck into a large cleared space and put it into park. She left the engine thrumming, turning to Jared in the cabin of the big car with bright eyes.

Jared folded her arms over the bulk of her peacoat and tugged her short red flared dress down-adjusting the v-neck, smirking back in return. "We're not making out in your driveway..."

"I wanted to brace you for what's coming," Jensen interrupted, her expression earnest yet somehow devious in a way Jared could only detect from that particular curve of Jensen's mouth, the too-vivid sparkle in her eye. "You know how my family is?"

Silently Jared nodded. The Ackles household was, for lack of a better term, domestic and homey and all of those things Jared might have called normal once, before she realized that few enough families enjoyed the kind of warm, functional closeness that the Ackles had. They weren't some kind of Stepford family – Jared had witnessed her share of arguments over the past three months – but she considered them to be the template for the ideal family. They did things together, and only Mackenzie seemed to chafe somewhat against that, and Jared had been welcomed wholeheartedly into their closeness with an easy fondness that still made her eyes sting when she was caught by surprise over it.

"They're about ten times more...well, like that, during Christmas," Jensen continued. One of her hands rested on the back of Jared's seat.

Jared nodded again, not sure where Jensen was going with this.

"Plus there's going to be friends, and family..." Jensen continued.

"Oh," Jared said faintly. "Full house?"

Jensen nodded. "About fifty people."

Jared summoned up her brightest smile. "It's no problem, I can handle it," she assured Jensen. She'd circulated plenty of her father's parties. She had the knack of party conversation down to an art form.

Jensen hitched up in her seat, getting closer to Jared. "That, right there," she murmured, touching Jared's face. "I knew it would put that look on your face. That's not your real smile, that's your public smile."

Jared blinked at her.

"It's just the six of us tomorrow," Jensen assured her. "But tonight will still be fun, okay?"

Jared's brows arched before she dissolved into a softer smile. Jensen knew her so well, Jared hadn't even realized it herself. She had been wanting it to be the smaller, family-sized group. She unbuckled her seat belt and wriggled as close to Jensen as she could get, grinning in earnest.

"It'll be fun because I'm there with you," she whispered to Jensen. "This is my first Christmas with you, and I'm so glad to be here."

Jensen's return grin brightened up her whole face.

"Plus, you promised me champagne spritzers," Jared continued, cocking her head expectantly.

Jensen chuckled. "Yeah, yeah. And...there's going to be gifts, heaps of gifts."

"Well, of course," Jared said. "It's Christmas."

Jensen's grin turned edgy. "Here's the thing, though; you were fretting about having gifts and there's a small pile for you..."

Jared flailed at Jensen's nearest shoulder. "Why didn't you tell me--"

"Baby, you're taking me to Poland," Jensen interjected, catching Jared's hand and tugging until Jared fell neatly into her arms. "Everyone in my family agreed that's enough."

Jared pursed her lips, glaring up at Jensen's jaw. "My father's taking you to Poland."

Jensen chuckled. "You didn't think I bought all the presents in there, did you?"

Jared began to shrug and Jensen hugged her close, stroking at her back.

"I did get you one thing," Jensen said against her hair. "And that's the other reason we're still out here. I wanted you to open it while we're still alone, together."

Jared perked up.

Jensen laughed and gave her hair a tug before releasing her to sit properly in her seat again. She caressed Jared's knee and sat up, reaching into her enormous coat.

"I didn't get you anything--" Jared said, flustered.

Jensen winked at her, outright winked, which made Jared laugh. "Oh, Jay, you know you already did."

"It wasn't much..."

"It was you," Jensen told her. "And that's all I wanted."

She pulled a small, square box from an inner pocket. It was brightly wrapped in reflective silver paper streaked through with matte silver designs, further adorned with accenting swirls of silvery glitter and intermittent specks of sparkly blue. A sprig of curly silver and blue ribbons was taped to the top.

Their fingers brushed as Jensen handed it over.

"It's not much--" Jensen began, deprecating.

"Shut up," Jared said fiercely, and glanced up in time to catch Jensen biting her lip over a grin.

With fingers that trembled slightly – from the cold, Jared told herself, even though the interior of the truck was toasty – she stripped away the ribbon and peeled away the wrapping that enclosed the little box. It was wrapped with sharp, crisp creases and Jared found herself wondering if Jensen had wrapped it herself or turned it over to Donna to do so. She smiled; she knew Jensen was precise enough when she chose to apply herself to have done such a good job.

Within, a silver jewelry box was revealed, and Jared caught her breath. It was the wrong shape for a ring box, and for that she had to pause for a split second of mingled relief and disappointment. What had she been expecting, a promise ring? At this stage in the game it was a bit late for chastity rings.

"Aren't you going to open it?" Jensen's quiet voice prompted her.

"Shh, I'm savoring the moment," Jared replied, looking down at the unlabeled box top, fitting her fingers along one edge.

"You're making me nervous," Jensen returned. "I'm not sure you're going to like it..."

You got it, Jared wanted to say, so of course I'll love it. She opened the box instead.

Nestling within on a bed of shaped white fluff, a small necklace sparkled with bright, tiny gems. It looked like an '8' turned on its side, and it was mounted on a thin silver chain.

"It's..." Jared's breath caught.

"The necklace, it's a symbol," Jensen began. Her fingers were nervously catching and rubbing at the nape of her neck.

"It's an infinity symbol," Jared completed, lifting her eyes to Jensen's. She broke into a brilliant smile.

The one that Jensen gave her in return was breathtaking. "I hoped you'd like it--"

This time she was interrupted by Jared surging across the space between them, tumbling into Jensen's arms even as she kept a tight grip on the necklace box. Jensen caught and held her, arms tightening around her.

"It's because I love you so much," Jensen said into her ear. "I never want to let you go."

Jared nodded, hugging her hard in return. "I'll never take it off."

They moved together at the same time and they were kissing. If there were a few salty traces of tears mixed in with the involved kisses they traded, they could both ignore it. They were engaged in a happier pastime now. Jensen cupped the back of her neck, kissing at her mouth until Jared parted her lips with a soft, eager noise. They traded kisses and tongue back and forth and Jared could quite easily melt into Jensen's arms for the rest of the night. She already knew without being told that they'd be all but glued at the hip for all of Christmas Eve.

Jensen's hand was a point of warmth at Jared's belly beneath her dress. Somehow she'd skillfully undone the buttons of Jared's peacoat and insinuated her fingers in there and Jared was realizing only now.

"In the car?" Jared said huskily against Jensen's wet lips as she stroked at her perfectly gelled hair, encouraging rather than putting her off in any regard.

"Why not?" Jensen returned, her thumb tracing over the top edge of Jared's dress. "It wouldn't be the first time..."

Jared's eyes fluttered and there was no resistance in her for the thought of going at it right there as Jensen claimed her lips again, her tongue pushing insistently into Jared's mouth as she reached up to cup one of her breasts through her bra. The heaviness of gathering lust was already simmering in the pit of her stomach, flaring in her groin. If they climbed into the back seat...

A rap on the window made Jensen jerk and Jared pulled her mouth away with a little shriek.

"Mackenzie," Jensen said with exasperation, straightening up in her seat as Jared tugged her clothes back into alignment, clutching the necklace box to her chest.

Jared craned her head and peered through the passenger window, where Mackenzie's blond head was barely visible. She was short, and would probably end up nowhere near Jensen's towering six feet of long-limbed height.

With the touch of a button, the passenger window whirred down and Jared tried to maintain a straight face as they stared out at Mackenzie, who wore a very put-upon expression.

"Mom says not to make out in the car all night, you can do that in the house after all the guests leave," Mackenzie told them. She was wearing a powder pink ski jacket and matching knitted scarf and ear-flap cap with a bobble at the crown of her head, and if it weren't for her stolid face Jared might have considered the overall impression to be adorable.

"What? Why not until they leave?" Jensen protested.

Mackenzie's flat expression cracked in the tiniest of triumphant smirks. "All the guest coats are piled on your bed," she informed Jensen, and turned to flounce off toward the house.

She was wearing powder pink Uggs, and Jared was torn between approval and the desire to volunteer to show Mackenzie a world of fashion beyond what she had been exposed to thus far.

"Let's go," Jensen said, reaching across the car to pet Jared's thigh.

Jared smiled at her and handed over the necklace box. "This first," she told her.

Jensen smoothed aside her long curly hair and drew the necklace around her neck, clasping its delicate catch at her nape. Her breath stirred over Jared's skin as she bent to kiss her nape above the necklace – right over the skin of her tattoo, Jared realized.

"You like to be independent..." Jensen began.

"I need to be free to choose," Jared interrupted. She turned in Jensen's arms and gave her a shy, yet resolved smile. "I've chosen you. It wasn't only because of your persistence."

Jensen grinned at her and passed a hand over Jared's cheek, her thumb skimming across Jared's cheekbone. "Let's go inside; I want to show off my girl."

They threaded their hands together as their footsteps crunched across the snow that had piled over the recently shoveled drive and sidewalk. There was a full night before them; people to meet, carols to sing, champagne spritzers to drink and so much food to eat Jared was sure she'd be bursting, replete to the point of being unsexy.

It would be the best Christmas Eve so far, and the warmth and brightest part was beside her; the kind of love she could never let go. Jared had her own true meaning for Christmas now, and she wanted to sing her heart out to share it with the world.


	9. Christmas Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its christmas morning for the girls, they plan their future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And its a wrap! i hope you all liked this story there might be some timestamps.  
> im in the process of writing a new story! Be looking! Thank you for all your wondeful comments.

Warmth enclosed her; the warmth was a cocoon keeping her safe and sheltered from the rest of the world. Outside was cold, and the demands of school and an uncertain future and what would happen in the year to come. For now, there was snow sifting down in fat, thick flakes and Jensen's arm was snug around her middle. It was exactly where Jared wanted to be, now and always, with the world at bay and the two of them together.

Jared watched Jensen sleep, her dark, thick lashes lying long as a boy's against her freckled cheeks – probably because she never used makeup the way Jared did. She was a natural beauty, and Jared's heart tugged as Jensen's mouth twitched and she made an almost-unheard smacking sort of noise in her sleep. Their noses were all but nudged together.

She was beginning to contemplate disentangling herself from their warmth and togetherness, at least for the purpose of freshening up, when a bang sounded on the door.

Jensen lurched out of sleep as Jared started up from her prone position and they knocked their heads together.

"What the fuck," Jensen lamented as Jared cringed, reaching up to explore the point where their skulls had connected.

The bedroom door swung open slowly on creaky hinges.

"I'm telling," Josh informed the two of them, standing on the threshold in Avenger pajamas he'd been gifted the night before.

Jensen began to surge out of bed and Jared grabbed her by the arms, reeling her into her lap. The last thing she wanted ten-year old Josh to see was the fact that they were both in their underwear, and even that had been reluctantly donned the night before. Jared had had to remind Jensen, twice, that they weren't sleeping over at Jared's place where they had more or less total privacy.

"Get up, it's Christmas!" Josh enthused.

"There's no Santa--" Jensen started to exclaim, and Jared clapped a hand over her mouth.

"Mom said you'd say that," Josh said, completely unfazed. "Get your ass downstairs, there's presents to open."

He turned around and pattered out of Jensen's bedroom on stockinged feet while Jensen struggled in Jared's arms.

"I'll tell," Jensen threatened in turn.

"We both said a swear, it cancels out!" Josh called, disappearing down the hall.

"I am going to kill that little--" Jensen fumed, up until she writhed around and ended up across Jared's thighs again. "Oh. Hey, good morning."

"Good morning," Jared replied demurely, rubbing her mouth at the corner of Jensen's in a brief kiss. "Merry Christmas."

Jensen's face brightened and she bowled Jared over against the rumpled covers. "Merry Christmas. I'm so, so glad you're here." She hovered over Jared, loose bangs tickling the exposed skin of her neck and shoulders, and Jared was certain she was about to be kissed.

A rap sounded at the side of the open door. "Please get decent, ladies, we're going to go downstairs and open gifts," Donna's voice requested.

Jared squirmed. Jensen was atop her and their groins were pressing together, separated only by two thin layers of panties, and her mother was right there. She pushed at Jensen's shoulders.

"Augh, mom, what time is it?" Jensen demanded.

"Seven a.m.," Donna replied.

Jensen uttered a curse that made Donna clack her tongue against her teeth, chiding.

"Mom! You can't us to be functional at this hour when we haven't even had coffee," Jensen complained.

"Sweetie, at least he doesn't wake us up at six a.m. anymore," Donna returned.

Jensen snorted and shifted atop Jared. It probably hadn't meant to be suggestive, but Jared had to clamp down on a little moan anyhow. "Yeah, because now you monitor his liquid intake, after he pulled that trick from the one Simpsons episode, drinking an enormous glass of water to force him to wake up super early. The little jerk."

"He's excited," Donna replied, and when Jared peered over Jensen's shoulder she could see Donna in the doorway in a lovely purple housecoat. "It's nice to see one of our family still getting so excited over special occasions like this."

"Oh, I'm excited, all right," Jensen mumbled.

"What was that?"

"Mom, you already know my best gift this year was Jared being home for Christmas," Jensen spoke up, louder.

"Hmm, yes, and I'm glad for you. That doesn't mean the two of you get to stay in bed together all day," Donna replied. "Five minutes."

The soft tread of her slippers moving on down the hall followed, and Jared tried not to sparkle up at Jensen's mischievous grin.

"We could manage five minutes," Jensen claimed, moving her hips in little motions that made Jared button her teeth over a groan and push up in spite of herself.

"Nnn...not with everyone downstairs waiting for us," Jared protested. She grabbed at Jensen's hand as it caressed down her side. "No. No way!" She tipped her head to the side as Jensen moved in for a kiss.

"Come on," Jensen said, coaxing, before nibbling at her ear.

"No, absolutely not," Jared replied.

"Give me one good reason," Jensen returned, freeing her hand of Jared's grip and stroking over the skin above her panties.

"Morning breath," Jared said, keeping her face averted.

Jensen grumbled, sitting up on her thighs. "You suck," she murmured.

"I'll suck your clit – later," Jared specified. "When we're back at my house."

With a sigh, Jensen pulled away from Jared, all but falling out of her side of the bed. "Okay, but we'd better go back to your house later today, or I may die of the cockblock."

Jared snickered. "You don't even have a cock," she pointed out.

Jensen paused in the doorway, hitching up her Christmasey-striped boxers. She turned a raised-brow look on Jared, who was still tangled up in the sheets and the lingering radiance of their shared warmth. "Don't I," she murmured, then she was gone.

After a moment of contemplation, Jared buried her face in her pillow. She had given Jensen a cock; or at least, a stand-in.

She had packed an overnight bag and actual silk pajamas, so she donned those and sought out the bathroom, where Jensen shared a sink with her and they tested one another's breath for freshness, afterward.

Downstairs, Josh was scampering around the living room passing out presents. Alan and Donna were folded into a loveseat together, Donna with her ankle hooked over her husband's. Mackenzie was in a big fluffy fuchsia robe on a solo armchair, sorting boxes into piles.

Fingers caught at her hand as they moved into the living room and Jared smiled. It had been a long time since she'd been a part of something like this, a Christmas morning tradition with the family clustered around the tree. She curled her fingers around Jensen's and they found their own place on a long couch across from the tree. It was decorated Jensen-style, with every ornament heaped upon the tree in a cluttered jumble that somehow still managed to be beautiful, if not precisely to Jared's taste. It shone with bits of tinsel and the glow of string upon string of golden-white lights. There was no particular color scheme, but it was lovely nonetheless.

Jared nestled into the curve of Jensen's arm and enjoyed watching everyone open their presents, surprised anew when it came to her turn and there was a small pile awaiting her, as well.

She got a small rectangular box with a bright red bow, and opened up the seam along the taped edge with her thumbnail.

Through the clear window of the packaging, she could see the shapes of a couple of smooth mounds, almost like a peach but there was something wedged in the crack, gold and glinting. Marzipan, the packaging proclaimed. As Jared turned the package in her hands she was startled into a laugh.

"It's...it's a man," she said aloud in surprise, taking it in.

Visible through the packaging was a small man shaped entirely of marzipan, airbrushed a rosy flesh pink with food dyes, his brown pants pulled down to reveal his bared buttocks. A large gold coin was wedged between them.

"Oh, my god, what is this?" Jared said, laughing.

Jensen leaned on her shoulder. "It's a dukat...uh..." She nodded to her parents.

"It's a Dukatenscheisser," Alan supplied with a grin. "A good luck charm, something to, ah, make sure you never run out of money."

"Really?" Jared said, still giggling.

Alan winked at her and Jensen said into her ear, "You can ask your European relatives when we see them next week. We all get one every year – they might have gotten one for you, as well."

Jared grinned and set it aside.

Last night there had been fireworks, and more food than Jared could deal with but she'd kept eating the platefuls Jensen had pushed on her. There had been crowded roomfuls of people, and champagne spritzers as promised, and steamy kisses at midnight when Jensen had taken her by the hand and led her upstairs for a moment away from the full house. They had gone outside in the crisp black night to watch fireworks bloom against the darkness as people left by twos and threes.

This would be a Christmas difficult to surpass, but Jared was storing up each memory, grinning brightly as Josh exclaimed over presents, smiling up gratefully as Donna came by to give her a fresh cup of coffee.

They stayed in their pajamas for hours, having coffee and danish and assorted other foods. There was soy-sausage on the table and free range eggs, cold cereal to spoon up and a wealth of sliced fruits. Jared pitched in with dishes, helping without a grumble because she was so utterly awash with gratitude for all that the Ackles had done for her. They cleaned up the living room, Jared holding out a garbage bag while Jensen made dramatic pitches of balled-up wrapping paper. Later they scrambled into clothes and Jared donned her coat to go around the block with Jensen and her black lab mix Scotty.

It turned into a snow romp, with Jensen plastering Jared with snowballs and Jared squealing and doing her best to fight back, scooping up snow into shoddy falling-apart wads that she flung Jensen's way, missing the mark more often than not.

They returned to the house breathless, flushed and laughing, and Jensen let Scotty's leash slip from her hand as she tugged Jared close to kiss her firmly.

"Can we slip away now?" Jensen whispered against the corner of her mouth.

Jared scrunched her nose up. "We're having Christmas dinner," she objected.

"Yeah, but you promised..." Jensen began, and instead of finishing the sentence, she kissed at Jared's mouth again, tonguing her way past her lips to stroke against Jared's tongue in a coaxing sort of gesture.

"And we still will, later," Jared promised, kissing at Jensen's full lower lip before tugging at her lip ring with her teeth. She was about to reach down and grab her ass when a piping voice intruded on their little moment.

"Gross! Kissing gives you cooties, you know."

Jared pulled away, about to laugh until she saw murder in Jensen's eyes.

"You little--" Jensen said, making throttling motions with her hands. She started toward Josh, who backed up a few steps.

"It's a real thing!" Josh asserted. "Look it up some time! Besides, if you want kissing you can go make your sims kiss in Sims 3, or something, right? That's cootie free."

Jensen lunged toward Josh and Jared caught her girlfriend around the waist. Josh squeaked and fled; Jensen turned in Jared's arms and gave her a triumphant smile.

"Now, where were we?" Jensen purred, setting a hand to Jared's hip.

"You were about to set the table," Donna replied, entering the front hallway. She had exchanged her housecoat for a sweater and jeans at some point, and wore a colorful apron over her front. She had a dishtowel in one hand and a smudge of flour on one high cheekbone.

"Aw, Mom..." Jensen tried to complain. "We just finished walking Scotty."

"Don't you 'aw, Mom,' me," Donna countered. "Mackenzie's already helping with the food, the least you and Jared can do is set the table."

"Of course we can," Jared said peaceably, catching at Jensen's hand. It was domestic touches like this that made her time at the Ackles' house invaluable.

They were halfway through laying out silver, Christmas pieces with sprigs of mistletoe inlaid into the handles with enameled green and red, when the front doorbell sounded.

"Jared, dear, would you get that, please?" Donna called from the kitchen.

Unseen, Jared nodded and hurried for the door, eep-ing when Jensen smacked her on the ass in passing.

"Merry Christmas," Gerald greeted her on the doorstep. He wore a long black trench coat, one of the elegant ones that Jared had picked out for him a few years before, and had a gigantic Marshall Field's shopping bag in his hand.

"Dad!" Jared exclaimed, and stepped forward to be enfolded in a hug.

"I heard there was tofurkey on offer," Gerald said against her hair. "I wouldn't want to miss this."

Jared snickered against his shoulder. He was only a few inches taller, so she had her head ducked against him.

"Thank you for joining us," she murmured.

He patted her back, awkward but sincere. "Without you, it wouldn't be a proper Christmas."

Jared grinned and led him into the house. Now her holiday was truly complete.

Though private time with Jensen was still high on her to-do list for the rest of the day, of course.

"Dad," Jared said, flashing a shy smile over her shoulder. "I'd like you to meet Jensen's parents."

Gerald sighed heavily, though his expression was good-natured. "And here I thought it was too early to meet prospective in-laws. All right, Jay, lead on."

"Dad!" Jared squealed, dancing up the hallway with ungainly strides. She put on an embarrassed front, but as she ducked her head her fringe of hair veiled a smile, and she reached up to touch the necklace that rested in the hollow between her collarbones.

It wasn't too early to start planning forever, after all.

 

They stood hand in hand beside the gate to International flights, but it wasn't a parting. Bags checked, passports in hand, they were ready to step forth into their next adventure.

"First Poland; next, the world," Jared declared outrageously, her grin widening when Jensen turned an indulgent expression on her.

"We're going forth and conquering?" Jensen asked. "I thought it was a visit to your family."

Jared shrugged. "Same thing. We're going to meet my Opa. I'm pretty sure he will insist you are a boy for the entire visit."

"I can work with that. I'd slay dragons for your hand," Jensen claimed, lifting Jared's knuckles toward her mouth, as though to brush a kiss across them.

Jared chuckled and pulled her hand free, tugging down the bill of Jensen's cap over her mischievous green eyes. "I'd settle for your putting up with Aunt Katerina."

"We've welcomed you into the bosom of our family," Jensen said, falling into step with her as they moved toward the security checkpoint. "It's only fair to endure the same...er, enjoy the same privilege."

"Then at least we've got each other," Jared replied.

Together they moved for the checkpoint. It felt like the start of something, and Jared took Jensen's hand again. They'd walk into their future endeavors with the will to make each moment count.

It was the strength that they gave to one another, and all that Jared wanted for any occasion.


End file.
